Mammogram Results-I'm losing it at work, please help me.(Update!!, Pg.6, #83)

[MerMom60_94]

I am another Dis'er who gets called back every time I get a mammogram. It's to the point that I expect the call back and get irritated by it, moreso than paniced. My mom and sister are breast cancer survivors and I had a lump biopsied somewhere around 10 years ago, so I know I am at risk. The first time I got called back I am sure I was anxious, but not to the point of not functioning. Now I just realize the density / composition of my tissue makes my results unclear and going back is more of an inconvenience than anything. OP, focus on the LIKELIEST scenario, not the WORST CASE scenario. Why would you do that to yourself? You have lots of people here who are saying this happens all the time and the person at Kaiser said it happens all the time. Why are you seeking out bad news to focus in on? Why are you making medical decisions on what you would do when you don't even have a diagnosis, much less your options to consider if it even is cancer? You're way ahead of yourself. Calm down and take things as they come.

 

[mom2aredhead]

I remember your thread from a couple of weeks ago. I'm sorry you're still having such anxiety over this (it does sound like it's progressed to panic). I think when this is over, it would be really helpful for you to see someone to help you work this through and give you coping strategies for other situations in the future. However, I can totally see why you'd feel worried about having cancer yourself having lived through what you did with your mother. My sympathies once again.

I hesitated to post, because as you can see from my signature, I'm a breast cancer survivor (6 1/2 yrs) so have been through what you're feeling - and more. (And I live with worry every day, but thankfully not as much as it used to be. Being a nurse sometimes makes it worse as I see the worst of the worst every working shift.) But the reality is that breast cancer is out there, we unfortunately can't make it go away.

I agree with the others that if it were something serious, you would have gotten a call and had further testing scheduled by now. When they saw a very suspicious spot on my mammogram, they sent me immediately for an ultrasound down the hall, then the radiologist came into the room afterward to meet with me and to say I needed a biopsy right away. When he added, "We have an opening tomorrow" I knew it was bad.

But guess what. Here I am, still here Dis-ing, still loving life, still being the best mother to my children and the best nurse to my patients that I can possibly be. Along with milliions of other Survivors. Surviving cancer helped me see things from a different perspective that I might not have otherwise seen. So, although we know that people do die of breast cancer, far more survive, so even in the worst case scenario, odds are (as I said in the other thread) that you'd be just fine.

With that said, I bet you're going to ultimately have a negative reading. Part of what they want to do on your first mammogram is to establish a "baseline" reading for which to compare future mammograms, therefore it has to be an excellent reading. They probably just want to redo it so that there is absolutely no question about your readings that may have been of inferior quality for whatever reason.

You hang in there.

PS on the Breast Cancer Survivors thread here, we have a saying (courtesy of NHAnn's DH): Don't bleed until your shot. I think it applies here.

And binny, I LOVE your Daddy's saying, too!

I'm sure Pea-n-Me doesn't remember, but she pretty much talked me down when I was freaking out because my mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Breast Cancer. She told me that yes cancer = scary, but because of all the research and advances they've made, it is no longer the automatic death sentence that it was years ago. The ladies on the GAGWTA (where I still occasionally lurk) thread are truly an inspirational bunch. And I think the most important thing that I retain from that thread is absolutely "Don't bleed 'til you're shot"

I was scared to death to go for my first mammo because of my mom's history, but people (including my own Doctor) had warned me that I will likely be called back for further testing/eval because as the daughter of a current breast cancer survivor ( how that sounds) they are extra vigilant. Sooo...I went for my first mammo last year and was immediately scheduled for an ultrasound/biopsy a few days later because they saw something. What they saw turned out to be several cysts which they "popped" (although I think aspirated is the right word LOL!) and I was sent on my way.

BTW, since her initial diagnosis, almost 3 years ago, my mom has had 2 surgery's and some radiation, but is going strong - still working at a job she loves and is enjoying her life and her grandchildren one day at a time.

So to the OP - Deep breaths. Relax. Don't worry about something that hasn't happened.

 

[buckler]

I'll chime in with another positive story. I was called back for additional views on my most recent mammogram. When I went back in they did another mammogram on my right side and had a radiologist read it immediately while I waited. There was something the radiologist didn't like on the new mammogram so they brought me back in right away for an ultrasound. The ultrasound showed three spots that they suspected were cysts but they wanted to check them out. So, I had to schedule to come back on another day for a cyst aspiration. When they aspirate the cyst if the color is "good" they know it isn't cancer. But if there is any off color or blood they have to send it off for testing. The first cyst he drained was good. But he tried to aspirate 2 cysts one right after the other without pulling the needle out since they were close and I think that caused some blood to get into the fluid. That meant they had to send it off to test for cancer cells. Fortunately, it came back negative and I was fine but it was a bit nerve racking waiting for the results.

 

[padams]

Some other perspectives- I have had several friends be diagnosed with cancer. They were called IMMEDIATELY- same day as the mammogram. One had advanced cancer and was in surgery the next day. The doctor had wanted her to undergo surgery the SAME day but she wanted a day with her child before the surgery.

I go to church with a doctor who is a radiologist specializing in mammograms. He has patients called back in for another look if he has the slightest, tiniest doubt because he does not want to miss anything.

 

[minkydog]

I had my mammogram last Wednesday at Kaiser. I've been worrying myself sick since then. I finally called the Radiology department to see if my results were in.

They were.

The scheduler transferred me to the Advice Nurse who gave me the bad news.

She said the "Breast Scheduling Team" will be sending me a letter saying they recommend I come back for another mammogram and possibly and ultrasound on my right breast...something about my nodule.

My mother died of breast cancer 2 years ago so now it looks like it has happened to me.

I called the number she gave me and it was a Kaiser Breast Health Line and to leave a message as they monitor the line all day. I am trying to get an appointment in today to do the test.

I'm so scared. I've been reading about women having breast cancer left and right.

My questions are, if I am in Stage 1, how long do I have to live?

My back has been hurting, but I've chalked that up to bending over alot picking up DS(6) out of the bath tub. Does that mean the cancer has spread to my back?

I've had no other symptons. I had an eye exam last Saturday and it came back with Astigmatism. If the cancer had spread there, would they able to tell?

How long do I have to live?

I'm at work, crying and losing my mind. I'm also angry because why did they not call me? Why send me a letter?

Had I not called, I would not have known. I'm so ANGRY at Kaiser. Now, I have to go back for further testing.

Please help!!

I understand that you're upset because your mother died from breast cancer, but really, you have catastrophized this until now you're dying? Not to diminish your situation, but you need to get a grip. First of all, it is not unusual AT ALL to have to go back for an ultrasound, especially if you have dense breasts. It may mean something or it may mean nothing. In the meantime you are eating up time and energy grieving something that may or may NOT be actual.

Even if it is a small cancer, breast cancer caught early is extremely treatable. It doesn't spread easily in early stages, and certainly not you your eyes! (I've never even heard of such a thing and i've been a nurse 34 years!) I know you're upset but can you see how you have spun this situation into the stratosphere? It's not healthy.

I trust that they will get you in pretty quickly. Hopefully, the new will be better. All lumps are NOT cancer. In fact, most of them are minor cysts, lumpy breasts or fat deposits. Once you get the results you will have time to grieve*if you need to* or more likely celebrate. Hold on and don't let these emotions run away with you. They aren't telling you the truth.

 

[laurie31]

I'm surprised everyone is recommending not to google though. Whenever I found myself freaking out about it, I'd go on the internet and it would calm me down, just because the statistics were so reassurring. For example, for every 100 callbacks, only a small percentage of those find anything that requires a biopsy. Of those that do get a biopsy, only 20% are actually cancer, many of which are in the early stages and highly curable. So the chances of actually having a malignant lump in the first place are very small. And then even if it is, the chances of it being curable are very good.

If the OP will google only "success stories" or "5 year survival rates" or something, MAYBE...but considering her level of anxiety, I don't think it's a good idea for her to do.

Hopefully re-reading the above paragraph will bring her comfort, though.

Julia said something about dense breast tissue and thickening of the tissue and this is why they don't recommend mammograms for women before Age 40 (I'm 36).

She also said we call back women every single day, this is what we do, we call back 20-31 women a day. I take a little comfort in that.

You are young. Young women have dense breast tissue. The chances of it being ABSOLUTELY NOTHING are very high. Listen to Julia - she's telling you what all of us are telling you - call backs are VERY common, and nothing to worry about yet.

I think my panic is so full blown is because I have DS(6). If I did not have any kids, maybe this would be easier for me to deal with. But I'm a nervous wreck because DS NEEDS me to be healthy. He needs me as he grows up.

No mother wants to die and leave their child to grow up without them, but most women don't panic about it to this degree.

DH and I have clearly stated in our wills who will get guardianship of our kids if the worst should happen. I can sleep at night knowing that, in the event of the unthinkable - which I hope will NEVER happen! - my children would be cared for in the manner we wish. Prepare for the worst, but hope for the best.

And I think about all of the Women who get these awful call backs, do they worry like I do until their follow up? Are they able to eat and sleep the night before?

Do their thoughts CONSUME them like they are consuming me right now?

No. No, sweetie they don't. And yes, most of them eat and sleep just fine. Please make that appointment with a therapist soon. There is no need for you to suffer like this.

I know many people who have had call backs, (in fact, I think I might have had one once, but it was such a non-issue to me, I can't remember for sure!) and I have a co-worker who was diagnosed with Stage 2 breast cancer. She had surgery, and 6 months of chemo. She's been cancer free for 12 years now. She just looks back on it as a tough 6 months of her life. She has many many healthy years ahead of her. Breast cancer isn't a death sentence, especially if caught early.

I'm trying to call Julia to ask her what is my worst case scenario?

Please, please, PLEASE do NOT do that!!! First off, she likely can't begin to tell you, and second - it's the last thing you need to be thinking about.

 

[MinnieTink]

OP I remember you from your original post a while back. Sending hugs your way. As far as call backs go, this happens a lot. As PPs have mentioned it could be breast tissue sort of overlaying itself to make nothing look like something. It is a tall order, I know, but try not to drive yourself crazy with worry. I will say a prayer for you. Please update when you can.

 

[Floridagal23]

OP,

I'm so sorry you're so stressed, but you really need to learn to take things one step at a time.

My DGM had breast cancer and was a survivor, my DM was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer and is now in remission and cancer free for several years, and I've had my own scare involving repeated mamos and ultraounds when I was 26..stress is horrible for you and will only make you physically ill. You cannot spend the night thinking "what if?" In the event that something is wrong, this will only make things worse. Just try to hang in there and take things as they come to the extent you can.

Breast cancer is extremely treatable now and you haven't yet been told anything is really wrong. Please try to hang in there until you get an official report!

Sending tons of good wishes your way.

 

[Lucky4me]

First of all, I'm sorry about your Mom.
Second-please don't worry so much about this!

I go to a breast care center where they immediately take a second look/fine needle biopsy/whatever, if it's needed then and there. It means being there for a few extra hours, but it's worth it to me because I always get that call back. Every time and I've had almost 18 years of Mammograms.
It's never been cancer and I lost my Mom to breast cancer too, when I was 25.
I also know more breast cancer survivors than I do women who have died from breast cancer.

Deep breaths, in and out, maybe go to your primary care doctor for a little something to keep you calm until the next appointment. Sounds like you may need it.

 

[Feralpeg]

OP, the chances that you have breast cancer are slim. Most suspicious areas found during mammograms turn out to be nothing. I've had many biopsies that were nothing.

I did, in fact, have breast cancer. I found a lump when I was 31. I am now 58 and going strong. I know that you are scared. I know that losing your mom to breast cancer makes this very hard for you to handle, but chances are they will find that it is not cancer. Should the worst happen and it should turn out to be cancer, that is not an automatic death sentence. If so, I'd have been gone a long time ago.

 

[DebbieB]

My mom and my grandmother both had breast cancer. I can't tell you how many callbacks I've had. Mostly when I was younger (late 30's, early 40's) with "dense" tissue. I had to go for an ultrasound last year for a small lump my PCP discovered outside of my regular mammo time. Fibrocystic disease. The main thing if you do have it is to catch it early. My mom had not had a mammogram for 14 years and she didn't do anything about the lump until it was too late.

 

[minkydog]

OP, the chances that you have breast cancer are slim. Most suspicious areas found during mammograms turn out to be nothing. I've had many biopsies that were nothing.

I did, in fact, have breast cancer. I found a lump when I was 31. I am now 58 and going strong. I know that you are scared. I know that losing your mom to breast cancer makes this very hard for you to handle, but chances are they will find that it is not cancer. Should the worst happen and it should turn out to be cancer, that is not an automatic death sentence. If so, I'd have been gone a long time ago.

Congratulations! You are a real success story. My aunt Ann had breast cancer when she was 37. She was part of an experimental study when they first started the surgery-chemo-radiation protocol. She responded beautifully and she was very proud of being a part of such an important study. Aunt Ann recently died, at the ripe old age of 77. That's a whopping FORTY years cancer-free. She was more than a survivor. She was an icon in our family.

 

[Bluestars]

I hope some of these stories well help ease your stress a little.

I got a letter in the mail after my last mammogram. I had to schedule an appointment for more pictures. The week I waited was very stressful. They ended up doing an ultra and everything was fine.

While I was in the waiting room, I asked the other women there if any of them had ever had a call back. ALL of them had at one time or another. Every single woman there.

If they are very concerned, they call you write away and don't just send a letter in the mail.

 

[aprilgail2]

She also said we call back women every single day, this is what we do, we call back 20-31 women a day. I take a little comfort in that.


And I think about all of the Women who get these awful call backs, do they worry like I do until their follow up? Are they able to eat and sleep the night before?

Do their thoughts CONSUME them like they are consuming me right now?

:

You are getting WAY to far ahead of this in thought. In the past 25 years I have been called back no less than 10 times for follow up testing and ultrasounds--and guess what...NOTHING- totally NOTHING was wrong with me. The first time I was a bit freaked but I got the letter in the mail then called and made an appt for the following week the earliest they could get me in. I just went about my daily business...it was in my thoughts but in my head I told myself it was nothing....after that everytime I get called back I just think "ok-here we go again, another letter" and back in for tests I go- I don't even give it a second thought when that letter comes saying I need a follow up anymore. I don't know many people that have NOT had to have a follow up at some point in their lives.

 

[aprilgail2]

If they are very concerned, they call you write away and don't just send a letter in the mail.

That is how i feel too- I don't so much mind the letter coming in the mail since that means there is no rush or anything wrong for sure--just needs to be relooked at. Last time I was there they didn't even let a lady leave- since someone is there reading the x-rays as soon as you take them if they see something bad they just keep you and don't even let you leave without further testing!

 

[Mkgaapril]

I am not sure if anyone covered this, if so I am sorry. I am headed to bed and saw this and wanted to comment.

The test results are always scarry. I hope and am sure you will be ok. With your mother having breast cancer your should research the rest of your family history.

See a genetic counselor. give the information of the cancers and who had them, both mother and father side. If the history is there, have a BRACA test. this will tell you if you carry a gene. If this is negative, also ask for a BART test. this is a second test. .. This will be a more detailed test. It takes much of the mind when these come back negative!

To any other woman out there, (men too) have this test done if there is a family history. If you carry the gene preventative treatment can be done... But, make sure you get life insurance before you have this test done. If you carry it the life insurance companies run...

Good luck, I wish you well.

 

[disneymarie]

I was sitting in the room still in a gown when they came in and gave me the news if I could stay, they would like to do the ultra sound and another test,. I am big breasted but what they say had to be determined.

I sat there fretting and worrying into a panic attack. Finally they evaluated and it was a blocked nodule, it had calcified. I did not have a family history of breast cancer and can certainly understand you panic.

It looks like there is so very much support here, praying and sending good thoughts sharing experience.

Wait until you may have something to really worry about if that happens.,From the stories here there are many that had the extended test and everything was okay in the end.

But your post did remind me that I am aggressive watched and reminded to get my mammogram done.

I will make my appointment tomorrow and stop avoiding it.
My prayers are with you,

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I'm sure Pea-n-Me doesn't remember, but she pretty much talked me down when I was freaking out because my mother was diagnosed with Stage 4 Breast Cancer. She told me that yes cancer = scary, but because of all the research and advances they've made, it is no longer the automatic death sentence that it was years ago. The ladies on the GAGWTA (where I still occasionally lurk) thread are truly an inspirational bunch. And I think the most important thing that I retain from that thread is absolutely "Don't bleed 'til you're shot"

BTW, since her initial diagnosis, almost 3 years ago, my mom has had 2 surgery's and some radiation, but is going strong - still working at a job she loves and is enjoying her life and her grandchildren one day at a time.

Of course I remember you and I'm thrilled to hear your mother is doing so well. That just made my day.

 

[msmouse]

Has anyone heard from DevotedChristian? I have had you on my mind since reading your thread. You remind me so much of me. My mind immediately goes to worst case and I have no control over it. After all is said and done and everything is fine, which I am sure yours will be, I feel a little silly and swear that I will never lose control again. But, as you know, that does not always work. One of the things that has helped me somewhat is to realize that the only real control we have over these health issues is to take care of ourselves, exercise and eat right. Then, if something does happen, we have done our part and we will deal with the situation. Hope to hear that all is well with you.

 

[buckler]

Has anyone heard from DevotedChristian? I have had you on my mind since reading your thread. You remind me so much of me. My mind immediately goes to worst case and I have no control over it. After all is said and done and everything is fine, which I am sure yours will be, I feel a little silly and swear that I will never lose control again. But, as you know, that does not always work. One of the things that has helped me somewhat is to realize that the only real control we have over these health issues is to take care of ourselves, exercise and eat right. Then, if something does happen, we have done our part and we will deal with the situation. Hope to hear that all is well with you.

From what she said in her posts, she was taking the day off from work today and having more testing done. I got the impression that she only has access to the boards when she is at work, and not at home. So I wouldn't expect to hear more until tomorrow.