lookingforward said:I have three children and appreciate all of the wonderful moments as well as the sacrifices and pain that comes along with parenthood. I am also a social worker and can understand that some people do not want children at all. I think it takes a brave person to admit that children are not on their agenda and then embrace that. Society tends to expect babies from couples but it is clearly not the right decision for some. Having children is full time, gritty, wonderful, dirty, exhausting, exhilerating, work. I have not slept through the night since 1990 (when my first child was born). I worry about the things I do and don't do for my kids. I worry about their health, their happiness, their futures. To me, it is the best and most complicated thing I have ever done. To someone else, it might be maddening. I have seen people struggle with being unhappy parents and once that decision is made it it lifelong. So to those who just "know" that they don't want kids, consider yourselves lucky to have such forethought. At work, I deal with many parents who were not insightful enough to realize that. Enjoy and revel in your decision, life is too short to worry about what other people think about your choices.
Oh, I agree with the person who suggested the line "It is none of your business" That is quick and to the point!
I would have to agree with lookingforward, I too have seen many of people who really shouldn't became parent do so, with out good results (and sometimes with good results, many people will say becomeing a parent forced them to grow up when they never would of otherwise.) Also people trying to great pregnant when they aren't married or commited to the other parent, with no regards to how this will effect the child and their future.
So you know, once you have your 1st kid, it doesn't stop. It seems like right after you get home from the hosptial people are asking you when and if you are going to have more. Just like reasons not to have kids often come across os selfish, so does reasons not to have more.
I also think that many people with kids feel it is a lot like talking to say a 2nd grade boy who want's to know why anyone would ever want to kiss a girl, yuck. And you know right now that is just how they feel, but you know feelings can change as you do. (This is not true for all people, as you know not everyone wants kids, not every boy grows up to be want to kiss girls either!)
My best friend never thought she would get married. She did last month. Now at 32 she and her new husband are dealing with the mater if they ever want kids in the future. It is very possible she will not be able to get pregnant, but adoptions is something they are both willing to consider, IF they want kids. As my life gets more consumed by my children I must admit it makes our friendship harder, our days are full of very differnt things. Many couples find it hard when their friends start to have children and they don't. (and vice versa.)