I don't want to go

[crisi]

This isn't DVC specific, but our every other year trip is coming up in October, and I'm just not excited for it. We shortened it so we could do a family reunion trip next year - that is part of the problem - I really want a full week. The family reunion trip is supposed to be this year, but my sister is just finishing up chemo and her baby just turned one and we felt it best to wait a year - that's part of the problem. When we realized we had points we had to use we invited friends - and its people I am indifferent to - that's part of the problem. In normal circumstances they wouldn't be my ideal traveling companions and this year they aren't my sister, so even closer friends would be difficult - and these aren't close friends - he's an old friend of my husband's and their kids are compatible ages. I'm putting off darn near all planning - fortunately we don't want any hard to get meals or I'd be SOL since I just finished dining reservations this morning - but its going to end up being a winging it trip - with guests - which is never ideal. I still need to call for Magical Express. And I think I'm just a little "Disneyed Out" - which is not the best trip to be taking friends on - if it were just us, we can wing it, but there is the guilt of not planning when you are bringing people. Plus, we really SHOULD have invited other friends who have been so kind to us in the past - but we'd vacationed with them last year and their son and my daughter did not do well, so we said "no way." This year our kids are getting along much better - so I'm regretting not doing what I SHOULD have done.

 

[loribell]

Sorry to hear that Crisi. I prefer longer trips too, but have been on a couple of shorter ones and had a great time.

I hope your sister is doing well. just think how much more enjoyable the trip will be next year when the baby is even older!!!! My favorite trips have been when I took my kids when they were right around two. They are so much fun at that age.

 

[jakenjess]

I hear ya!! We leave in less than a month, and for the first time EVER I'm not really excited about this trip. Like you, it's a shorter trip than usual (five nights) for a couple of different reasons. My parents are coming along on this trip, and we're staying at a 2 BR at OKW. I love my parents dearly, but sometimes things can get a little tense, if you know what I mean! Plus we had a summer full of large expenses (summer camp, a couple of out-of-state weddings, vet bills, car repairs, etc., etc.) and I'm not feeling great financially at the moment.

We were planning on another trip in April, just DH, me, and DS and DD, but we've decided to postpone indefinitely until we're on better financial footing. Never thought I'd say it, but maybe we're a little Disney'd out also?

 

[BWV Dreamin]

This isn't DVC specific, but our every other year trip is coming up in October, and I'm just not excited for it. We shortened it so we could do a family reunion trip next year - that is part of the problem - I really want a full week. The family reunion trip is supposed to be this year, but my sister is just finishing up chemo and her baby just turned one and we felt it best to wait a year - that's part of the problem. When we realized we had points we had to use we invited friends - and its people I am indifferent to - that's part of the problem. In normal circumstances they wouldn't be my ideal traveling companions and this year they aren't my sister, so even closer friends would be difficult - and these aren't close friends - he's an old friend of my husband's and their kids are compatible ages. I'm putting off darn near all planning - fortunately we don't want any hard to get meals or I'd be SOL since I just finished dining reservations this morning - but its going to end up being a winging it trip - with guests - which is never ideal. I still need to call for Magical Express. And I think I'm just a little "Disneyed Out" - which is not the best trip to be taking friends on - if it were just us, we can wing it, but there is the guilt of not planning when you are bringing people. Plus, we really SHOULD have invited other friends who have been so kind to us in the past - but we'd vacationed with them last year and their son and my daughter did not do well, so we said "no way." This year our kids are getting along much better - so I'm regretting not doing what I SHOULD have done.

Vacationing with others, even families, can be very stressful. I think what your feeling is very normal. And you obviously have much more to be concerned with besides planning for the trip. Do your guests expect you to go thru the parks with them? Maybe you could plan some together and "alone" time, you know meet up later in the day. This will give you some space and time. You could simply say that you have "done that" many times, and would prefer to relax a little, but would like to get together later. Sometimes the best trips are the ones "you don't plan for"! Hope all goes well.

 

[Granny]

Sounds like a "perfect storm" of issues trying to block you from having a good time for this year's trip. Very sorry to hear of all of them, especially your sister's health problem. Best wishes to her on that.

I think that as long as you take a laid back approach to the vacation you will be fine. Avoid the commando touring, don't make too many plans and let people go their own way so you don't have to be the daily schedule maker/negotiator.

I hear you when you say there is the guilt of not planning when bringing new people to WDW, but we just did that with a couple of my daughter's friends two months ago and let them figure out their own schedule. It worked out great!

I don't know how old your children are, but is there a possibility that they could be the "WDW tour guides" for your guests?

I feel for you...bringing guests to WDW is a big undertaking if you're not really feeling gung ho about it. Try not to stress and feel guilt. Much easier said than done, of course, but maybe you can make some skeleton plans and just let people attend the things they want?

Good luck with the trip, and hang in there!

 

[crisi]

I've tried the gentle hint of "we could split up" but they are more than happy to let us be the native guides - so I don't think I can shake them without being impolite. And we extended the trip by a day without them to have some family time - and because I kept looking at a really short trip and saying "no way."

We do have one dinner where my delay has resulted in requiring two tables for our party - not at all disappointed about that.

It will work out - I'll do the amount of work I'm comfortable with and if their vacation isn't perfect, I'm not taking the blame for people who answer "anything is ok" to nearly every question we ask.

And I can turn over the park activities to my husband once I get the pre-trip planning done - he can decide what to go see next and drag me through the parks - he is fine at that.

 

[dianeschlicht]

I can understand your feelings. We have actually quit inviting people for awhle, because we can't convince folks to "go on their own" a bit. I love having guests, but I get tired of playing constant tour guide and not getting some time to do what we want to do too.

 

[loribell]

I am through inviting people to join me to for a while. Just spent what was supposed to be 5 or 6 days that turned in to 9 with my folks, sister & great niece. Lets just say I was ready for it to be over.

 

[bobbiwoz]

Sometimes we have the best times when we least expect it...I hope that happens to you. Best wishes to your sister and your whole family.

Bobbi

 

[Disneynut71]

I just got home from a trip 3 weeks ago. For the first time I couldn't wait to get home. I brought some family members that complained the last trip and whined so I am still kicking myself for bringing them again.

March I did a trip just with my own kids no one else and it was outstanding. We stayed 2 full weeks and i'm planning my next trip in June for 2 more weeks.

Good luck with the trip. I found the best way to deal is to go off on your own. We had much more fun that way.

 

[Deb & Bill]

I had similar feelings about our trip in Nov for Thanksgiving. Then we canceled it and I began to feel better. Now we have enough points to still go in June (had a reservation and cancelled that one, too, to free up the points on some of our contracts). With three contracts listed for sale, I'm just not as thrilled anymore. Maybe we'll do Universal in June, but stay at OKW.

 

[Beca]

Crisi...I am so sorry to hear that!! My dh wants to kill me all the time, because I always seem to invite guests with us...and he wants it just to be "us". I have a really difficult time though, when my dd says, "Nana, you can come and sleep on our sofa." She also has a "best friend" from when we lived in AZ, and if we don't meet them in WDW...we never get to see them.

I would definitely say to find a way to have "alone time" with just your family. Our friend from AZ keep a very different schedule (they get up really early and are through with the parks by 7pm, whereas my dd would sleep until noon (when we let her), and close the parks down at midnight. This makes for some great "family time". We usually meet up somewhere in the middle of the day for a few hours...then, they go their way, and we go ours. So far, it has worked out really well.

With my mom, it usually works out well because she definitely NEEDS a break from us, and our "hustle" pace. She and my stepdad will usually get up early and do the parks by themselves for the morning, and we will meet them somewhere by noon for lunch. They will usually take my dd for a few hours (they like my dd much more than they like us!!), which gives my dh and I some time to ride the "grown up" rides. We will find them around dinner time, and they will go back to the room, while we spend the evening with our dd.

So, maybe you and your friends will find a "groove" for traveling together. Maybe you should politely state that you need a few hours each day just for family. We have done this with all of our traveling buddies, and usually find that they are quite relieved to split up as well.

I wish you the best, and hope you have a much better trip than you are expecting!!!

 

[gopherit]

While I hope for the best for you and your travels, I also have great empathy and understanding! I know all too well what you've described. SIL and BIL pull the "whatever you do is fine!" line with us every time. And we have tried to politely set them up on a separate adventure... once, right before Hurricane Charley came ashore, we "ditched" them in the hotel that morning. They did just fine - they had a late morning and leisurely b'fast on their own while our crew did EPCOT. But I still ended up taking an extra 3 days on our trip just for some private family time. And it really does depend on the company you keep - because when my sister and her family travel with us, we NEVER have that problem. We go our own ways, meet up for dinner - it all works well. On our last 2 trips, we didn't extend the invitation to SIL/BIL because as you described, our dd and their ds didn't click too well at all. Our parenting styles are very different too. Well, imagine my surprise when she turns to me this summer and says, "Hey, BTW, we decided we're coming with you on your Disney trip next summer." What the poooo? I informed them it likely wouldn't work out - we can only travel the first 2 wks of June next summer, and that's 2 weeks too early for them and their school schedule. Not a problem, she says - their son will just miss school. What the double poooo? The last 2 weeks of school? THe field trips, final tests, all that? She also didn't understand why it would be a problem for them to stay with us (we have a fam of five and intend to use the WHOLE 2 br villa, no, you can't fit 5 more folks in there with us!) They are amenable to getting their "own" villa but very adamant on staying in the SAME type place as us. Ok, fine, sez I, and I showed BIL a little spreadsheet I worked up, showing him the cost of the 1BR villa, and also the cost of a 150 pt HHI resale. He says, "But we don't want to go to WDW every year. I said, "And you probably can't - not with only 150 pts. But you could bank and save and do WDW every other year for at least a week, you could even do HHI which SIL loves every other other year... you could work it out that you do WDW every 4 yrs, and HHI every 4 years, or something like that.... He looks at the table and says nah,we will just pay cash for the room. He then later tells DH that it would be "stupid" to buy into DVC - that he would do better to just invest his money. Well, you can call my poor DH a lot of things, but when you accuse him of being careless with his moolah - them's fightin' words. I get stuck doing ALL the planning, then, as we cruise around WDW I have to hear my BIL make fun of all the expenses, when I have busted my patookus to get the best deals out there for them. No one so much as cracks open a map, - they expect me to do it for them, then they get to make fun of me and my "obsessive-crazy planning." Grrr. So I'm having a REAL hard time getting worked up about this trip. I have reserved a room for our fam, but nothing for them. Haven't looked into tickets, or anything of thae sort, even knwing that the tix prices were rising a few weeks back. It's hard to work up even a modicum of energy.

I do agree with the posters who have said sometimes, however, a change in travel ways (like not planning when you normally obsessively plan) can be a nice switch and pleasant surprise. Last year we went to Universal and Disney sans any family, and I really didn't do much homework at all. It was a great trip, and fun was had by all. Maybe that's another reason for my current apathy - I'm beginning to learn that fun can occur spontaneously too.

In any case - I hope your trip is a great, relaxing and fun-filled surprise as well - no matter who is along for the ride! And if you don't FEEL like planning -hey, go with that. Maybe it's an idea whose time has come!!

 

[3DisneyKids]

I hear ya!! We leave in less than a month, and for the first time EVER I'm not really excited about this trip. Like you, it's a shorter trip than usual (five nights) for a couple of different reasons. My parents are coming along on this trip, and we're staying at a 2 BR at OKW. I love my parents dearly, but sometimes things can get a little tense, if you know what I mean! Plus we had a summer full of large expenses (summer camp, a couple of out-of-state weddings, vet bills, car repairs, etc., etc.) and I'm not feeling great financially at the moment.

We were planning on another trip in April, just DH, me, and DS and DD, but we've decided to postpone indefinitely until we're on better financial footing. Never thought I'd say it, but maybe we're a little Disney'd out also?

Lori--you need to go in Feb. when Maine is sooo gross and awful! THEN you'll be excited about going! October is the best month here, IMO. Hope you get excited soon!

Crisi--sounds like several things came together to make this a less than ideal trip for you. Hang in there and plan some special things just for you! That might make a difference. Maybe something at the SSR Spa? Or maybe you and DH can go to the California Grill (or whatever your favorite place is) and the friends will watch the kids as a "thank you" for being the tour guides. Try to find a few special things that will make the trip good for YOU.

 

[DisDaydreamer]

Hope your sister is doing ok.

Boy, I feel bad for your situation. I guess since it is going to happen the best you can do is try to make the most of it. You know that your mindset is going to influence the outcome.

Maybe it's a good thing that it is not a full week and your saving points for next year. Perhaps the first couple days you can be tour guide and then cut them lose to experience the parks on their own.

Hopefully, you'll hit it off with them and find it to be comfortable and fun. Keep a casual pace to reduce the stress and if they want to zoom ahead... tell them to have a geat time.

Good Luck.

 

[jakenjess]

Lori--you need to go in Feb. when Maine is sooo gross and awful! THEN you'll be excited about going! October is the best month here, IMO. Hope you get excited soon!

I know!! I love getting out of here in the dead of winter! However, the kids have never done MNSSHP, and my parents hate to leave their house for any period of time in the winter (don't ask ) so Oct. it is.

Crisi, I hope your trip goes well. I know how exhausting it can be to be the official planner/tour guide (I know I've had enough of it for awhile). My very best wishes to your sister.

 

[loribell]

I know!! I love getting out of here in the dead of winter! However, the kids have never done MNSSHP, and my parents hate to leave their house for any period of time in the winter (don't ask ) so Oct. it is.

Crisi, I hope your trip goes well. I know how exhausting it can be to be the official planner/tour guide (I know I've had enough of it for awhile). My very best wishes to your sister.

Well maybe MNSSHP will help. One of the times we went for a short trip it was for MNSSHP. WE had one of best trips ever!

 

[crisi]

Hope your sister is doing ok.

Boy, I feel bad for your situation. I guess since it is going to happen the best you can do is try to make the most of it. You know that your mindset is going to influence the outcome.

Maybe it's a good thing that it is not a full week and your saving points for next year. Perhaps the first couple days you can be tour guide and then cut them lose to experience the parks on their own.

Hopefully, you'll hit it off with them and find it to be comfortable and fun. Keep a casual pace to reduce the stress and if they want to zoom ahead... tell them to have a geat time.

Good Luck.

Oh, don't feel too bad for me - we are going to Disney. I'm going to spend a few days with my family away from work. We aren't taking my favoritest people in the whole world, but we would have never invited them if I actually disliked them - and its a short trip. We've booked both Flying Fish and California Grill over our short trip - so the food should be pretty good. I think I've done a pretty good job of setting expectations for these people in a "on this short of a trip, we won't do EVERYTHING" sort of way. - and the reason we invited them is she hasn't been since 1984 or so, he's never been, and she wants to take families down - this is a good "taste of Disney" trip - native guide provided - for them to decide if the expense, bother, and coordination of such a trip is worthwhile.

And next year my sister will have hair, her kids will be a year older and we will still manage to have a great trip with them.

 

[snowbunny]

And next year my sister will have hair, her kids will be a year older and we will still manage to have a great trip with them.

There you go...eyes on the prize.

 

[goldilocks_63]

If plane tickets haven't been purchased, perhaps you could cancel....?

goldi