Diet & Exercise

[sam_gordon]

DW & I both need to lose weight. We have motivation (health, vacations, etc), but neither of us has the will power. The motivations we have aren't "strong enough", so to speak, to stick with a diet and/or exercise plan. Of course, we've never really sat down and come up with a plan, but we know us. We'll be "good" for a week, maybe two, but then it's too easy to slide back into bad habits (fast food, lack of exercise, sugary snacks).

We don't belong to a gym (we have in the past but never really used it), we don't have a treadmill/exercise bike (because it will become a clothes rack), and don't have confidence that we can stick to a diet.

So, short of saying "you just have to do it" (sorry, not helpful), any suggestions?

 

[EmilyGahr]

Have you considered OrangeTheory? I find the group classes super motivating, and it's such a good workout!
Bonus - if you sign up for a class and decide you don't want to go, you have to cancel more than 8 hours before the class starts or you get charged a fee! Not wanting to pay that fee has got my butt to class on days I didn't want to go

 

[Bethislucy]

I am right there with you but I'm 2 months in and it's going well so far not that all days have been good but I've came a long way. One thing is I didn't just go crazy balls to the wall to start. I started with planning healthy dinners but also making Fridays still feel like Friday but instead of take out I make it at home. (I enjoy cooking and learning new recipes so this is still fun for me.) So our big Friday night was Chinese take out. I just searched till I found some recipes online that are healthy and then I also control the oil and stuff like that. The other thing is I started to walk at lunch 30 mins. It has gotten now to I walk 20-30 mins in the morning before work (around the hallway at work) then I go to the Y for my lunch hour and I walk my two 15 minute breaks at work again just around the hallway.

One thing I saw that was helpful for my mindset was dived the day into 4 quarters if you just totally blow it at breakfast don't blow it the rest of the day just say well that wasn't the best quarter of my day but I got 3 more to make better choices.

Like I started small and just went from there. I'm already down a clothing size and I've became one of those crazy people that plan their meals but I also had pie at a event at work and didn't feel bad about it. It was smaller than I normally would have did but I still took part.

 

[NannyBeBe]

You seem to have ruled out the things that would help -- diet, exercise, gym, etc. My daughter and I are both in the process of losing the weight we gained during the pandemic. First, we removed from the house anything that we should not be eating. We have plenty of healthy snack foods so that if we are tempted, we can have a healthy snack. We also drink a lot of water. We are keeping our calorie count at approximately 1500 per day. My daughter sees a dietician on a regular basis and these are suggestions that the dietician has given her. So far it has worked and we are both losing slowly. When it comes down to it, it is a matter of changing what you eat and how much you eat.

 

[antmaril]

DW & I both need to lose weight. We have motivation (health, vacations, etc), but neither of us has the will power. The motivations we have aren't "strong enough", so to speak, to stick with a diet and/or exercise plan. Of course, we've never really sat down and come up with a plan, but we know us. We'll be "good" for a week, maybe two, but then it's too easy to slide back into bad habits (fast food, lack of exercise, sugary snacks).

We don't belong to a gym (we have in the past but never really used it), we don't have a treadmill/exercise bike (because it will become a clothes rack), and don't have confidence that we can stick to a diet.

So, short of saying "you just have to do it" (sorry, not helpful), any suggestions?

I don’t have the answer because your post describes me to a T. Like you, I wish I could figure it out. Good luck!

I have made one improvement - since the beginning of March, my friend and I have been walking on the indoor track at our community center two/three times a week. We walk for about 50 minutes each time.

The struggle is real. I gained about 20 pounds during the pandemic. Ugh.

 

[mi*vida*loca]

I think when you tell yourself I can’t have this or that it’s too much restriction and you fall off the wagon quickly.

Track calories. You can eat what you want. You just need to stay within your calories. So many people think you need to restrict so many things but you really don’t. After having DD I lost 50 pounds with the MyFitnessPal app (tracked my calories) and walking 40 minutes a day. I ate what I wanted but I stayed within my calorie count. I ate fast food on occasion, soda, fries, etc. I also amped up my exercise over time. It took me 8 months but slow and steady wins the race.

Good luck! I need to get back on it and lose some weight right now too!

 

[luvnwdwgal]

Will power is the hardest and most important thing. You have to get your head in the game for it to work. I struggle everyday too. All I can say is to just eat better. Eat more fruit and vegetables. Cut down on carbs, fat and sugar and try to at least get out for a walk 4-5 days a week. Don’t weigh yourself everyday either. Once a week is good. Concentrate on one day at a time. Keep it simple. Don’t overwhelm yourself.

 

[Wendy1985]

Maybe it is just me but when I needed to lose weight my mom found healthy food that tasted better than the junk I was eating

as far as the gym find a group of friends to go with

 

[sam_gordon]

You seem to have ruled out the things that would help -- diet, exercise, gym, etc.

We're not against any of it. We're being realistic. Is it better to say "we'll go to the gym 3 days a week!" and then fail? Or simply say "we don't have the will power to go to the gym, how do you do it"?

 

[kdonnel]

We know we don't have will power either. We solve most of that by just not buying things we shouldn't be eating.

As for the exercising, it really does help to have an exercise partner that is not your spouse. At least in my case it is a lot easier to agree together to skip the gym with my spouse than a friend.

 

[JoeA]

I simply limited the amount of beef, chicken and pork I consume, eat more fish and dishes from the Mediterranean diet, snacks are things like fruits, nuts or olives, and walk a few miles each morning. I don't think you need a "diet" per se (i.e. weight watchers, etc), just make sure your diet is healthy and portions are appropriate.

I have dropped weight and feel better just doing those simple things, and it's easy.

 

[belle032]

Make small changes. Get rid of unhealthy snacks in the house. Go for a walk every day and make it part of your routine. Park your car farther away from whatever building you're going into. Find a friend to be active with and keep each other accountable.

For being active, start small. If you find yourself talking yourself out of it-just put your workout clothes on. Still talking yourself out of it? Do 5 mins of exercise. 9 times out of 10 you'll do more because getting started is usually the hardest part!

I joined Beachbody on Demand a year or two ago and follow their programs. Highly recommend. I know myself and unless I have an actual program to stick to and mark off a calendar, I won't do it. I like knowing exactly what my workout is going to be and I like checking it off a calendar, tracking weights, and seeing progress.

I know you said don't say "just do it," but unfortunately, that's a big part of it. You do have to just do it. And want to do it. No one is going to make you do anything but you.

 

[loves to dive]

I'm right with you, for some reason when I hit 60 it just all went to halifax in a hand basket. I couldn't find the umph to get up in the mornings and work out (I have an entire workout room in our basement that includes a weight bench, free weights, balance board, pilates circle, stretchy bands and cords and over 100 DVDs, and an elliptical). I couldn't seem to get in the groove of eating healthy. As a result in the last 4 years (I'm 64 now in case math isn't your thing) I've gained about 20 lbs. Not a lot but I'm a small woman so I had to go up a size in clothes for the first time since I've been an adult. It doesn't help that hubby has no intention of eating right or exercising. He has put on probably about 60 or 70 lbs and seems content with it and insists on having all the bad things you can think of in the house. I've tried starting easy and just walking the dog at night after supper but our little yorkie has a bum knee and can't walk alot, which means I carry her. Better for me and I have a carrier I wear but walking with 9 lbs. hanging on me isn't easy. Now my excuse is I live in Georgia and it's hotter than the 7th level of halifax here even at 8 at night. We live in a rural area so walking after dark or before sunrise in the morning isn't smart since the coyotes are out having fun at that time of day.

I'm going to do it though, if it kills me (which it might). I've decided starting Monday my happy rear end will be down in that basement working out. I intend to start with just a mile walking DVD for about a week to get back in the groove and using light weights a few times a week. Hubby and I rarely eat together any way as I don't eat fried food and it's a staple for him so I'm just going to have to start cooking (which I hate more than folding sheets). Lower fat meat grilled, more fresh veggies and fruits. Here I come.

 

[NYCgrrl]

DW & I both need to lose weight. We have motivation (health, vacations, etc), but neither of us has the will power. The motivations we have aren't "strong enough", so to speak, to stick with a diet and/or exercise plan. Of course, we've never really sat down and come up with a plan, but we know us. We'll be "good" for a week, maybe two, but then it's too easy to slide back into bad habits (fast food, lack of exercise, sugary snacks).

We don't belong to a gym (we have in the past but never really used it), we don't have a treadmill/exercise bike (because it will become a clothes rack), and don't have confidence that we can stick to a diet.

So, short of saying "you just have to do it" (sorry, not helpful), any suggestions?

Pick a something to remove from your regular diet. Right now it’s frequently hot so soda switched to seltzer might be an answer. Same for fast food. Take a walk together early in the morning or early evening; great way to reconnect.
Pick something and just do it.
Sorry if this isn’t helpful.

 

[tzolkin]

We're not against any of it. We're being realistic. Is it better to say "we'll go to the gym 3 days a week!" and then fail? Or simply say "we don't have the will power to go to the gym, how do you do it"?

What about walking? Is there somewhere close to your house that would be nice to go for a walk? That might be easier to get into a routine than going to a gym to exercise. I think most spouses spend some time talking about their day and hanging out with each other, so you could get in the habit of walking for an hour a day while you talk instead of sitting at the house.

Finding something that is convenient that you'll actually do is important. We used to live in a neighborhood with lots of trees and sidewalks and had a tiny unfenced yard. I started walking regularly and wound up adopting a dog so that would ensure that I was obligated to walk every day regardless of the weather. I walked a minimum of 6 miles per day for years. We moved to a new house on a busy road with a fenced in yard and if I take a walk 2-3 times per week now, I'm doing well. We have a nice park with trails that's only about 5 minutes away, but having to get into the car and drive there is much more of a deterrent than I would have imagined.

 

[sam_gordon]

Amazingly, I'm the same weight as I was two years ago. Don't get me wrong, I'm overweight (technically obese) now and I was then. But it's not like I keep adding to my weight.

 

[TwoMisfits]

Suggestion - like a PP said, start small and do it every day.

Focus on one thing and get that habit down, and then move to another.

For now, I'd focus on activity. Just walk out the front door every morning after coffee and go til you want to turn back...and every week, add 100-200 yards more to that route until you're up to 2-3 miles (a good 45-60 minute walk). Do it rain or shine (get a golf umbrella) - it's just part of the routine (heck, do it before coffee, if you think you'd be more motivated 1st thing). Then, it's done and you can start your day...

Then once you're in the "adding" phase to walks, start with food/drinks. Never call it "diet" b/c it's not that, but take 1 habit, like soda, and just end it and replace it with something else (sparkling water, water, tea, even more coffee b/c that's better than any soda, although other options are preferred). Get that habit down, and then maybe pursue types of processed foods next.

 

[sam_gordon]

What about walking? Is there somewhere close to your house that would be nice to go for a walk? That might be easier to get into a routine than going to a gym to exercise. I think most spouses spend some time talking about their day and hanging out with each other, so you could get in the habit of walking for an hour a day while you talk instead of sitting at the house.

Finding something that is convenient that you'll actually do is important. We used to live in a neighborhood with lots of trees and sidewalks and had a tiny unfenced yard. I started walking regularly and wound up adopting a dog so that would ensure that I was obligated to walk every day regardless of the weather. I walked a minimum of 6 miles per day for years. We moved to a new house on a busy road with a fenced in yard and if I take a walk 2-3 times per week now, I'm doing well. We have a nice park with trails that's only about 5 minutes away, but having to get into the car and drive there is much more of a deterrent than I would have imagined.

DW & I actually went for a walk at a park yesterday. We'll occasionally take a walk in our neighborhood, but we live at the bottom of a hill. When I was going into work at 9:30 (it's now 8:30), I used to walk the neighborhood after the kids got on the school bus. My fitness app said I had climbed 21(!) flights of stairs during that walk. I used to do that every day until I had to come into work earlier. And as @loves to dive says, it's hot.

Yes, I know I'm making excuses.

I used to drink two 20oz sodas every day. About 4-5 years ago I quit cold turkey. Now I might have a soda once a month. I do water, sports drinks, and sweet tea. I snack out of boredom usually. I'm lazy and don't want to pack a lunch. It's just easier to hit the fast food places.

I'm sure a lot of you are saying "stop making excuses and just do it". And that's probably what I would tell my kids or anyone else. I just can't seem to tell myself. Well, I can, I just won't listen.

 

[TwoMisfits]

DW & I actually went for a walk at a park yesterday. We'll occasionally take a walk in our neighborhood, but we live at the bottom of a hill. When I was going into work at 9:30 (it's now 8:30), I used to walk the neighborhood after the kids got on the school bus. My fitness app said I had climbed 21(!) flights of stairs during that walk. I used to do that every day until I had to come into work earlier. And as @loves to dive says, it's hot.

Yes, I know I'm making excuses.

I used to drink two 20oz sodas every day. About 4-5 years ago I quit cold turkey. Now I might have a soda once a month. I do water, sports drinks, and sweet tea. I snack out of boredom usually. I'm lazy and don't want to pack a lunch. It's just easier to hit the fast food places.

I'm sure a lot of you are saying "stop making excuses and just do it". And that's probably what I would tell my kids or anyone else. I just can't seem to tell myself. Well, I can, I just won't listen.

If it's boredom, find a new boredom plan. Get paper books or magazines, get puzzles, get a rubik cube or a squishy hand exerciser, whatever - something to occupy your fingers while you feel bored. And if you feel "hungry" when bored, grab a glass of boring water. Drink it slowly, and then see if you really want to eat afterwards.

 

[Kittyblue]

I know many people who only walked for exercise as they worked on weight loss. If you aren't sure about joining a gym it's an easy place to start. When the weather is too extreme try Leslie Sansone videos on YouTube. If you do decide you want to join a gym, I suggest looking into working with a personal trainer, at least to get you started. When I had a trainer I met with her once a week. I'd tell her about my concerns and what I wanted to work on or try, she showed me new exercises or different way to do things, how to use the various equipment at the gym, and put me through a routine that I could do on my own the rest of the week. At my gym the trainers charge by the session, whether it's one person or more, and often times I'd see them working with couples together.