I hate early mornings.
And when the alarm
screeched in my ear
at 4:30am...
For whatever reason,
I had always thought
I'd never get to Los Angeles.
I'd never had any desire
to go to the original
House of the Mouse.
Really? I never would have expected that.
We arrived at the Delta
check in and were
greeted with this sight:
Oh, come on! Why are all of these people up so early?
"What if that was just some
random guy who just stole
our suitcases?"
"Nope." Kay replied.
"He had a nice hat. So he's legit."
Very reassuring.
We now had time to kill,
so I purchased a cheap watch
and ground it under foot
until the glass shattered
and its nervous little tick ceased.
And suddenly, everything around you froze in place.
so I bought a Chai tea latte
I went on a tour of the Ben & Jerry's factory way back when. Part of the appeal of it was that they give you free ice cream samples at the end of the tour. Only problem was, they chose the flavor. We got to try the Chai tea latte smoothie.
It tasted like pumpkin pie ice cream.
Obviously I had picked the port side
so we wouldn't have to have
one of us (aka: me)
in the middle seat for a change.
Veteran move, right there.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"My hips and thighs are sore."
She replied.
I was stumped for a second.
But only a second.
I started to grin.
"Rode any horses lately?" I asked.
That'll do it!
As a parent, this is gold.
A lesson for all future parents.
(furiously scribbling notes)
She, of course, is not allowed
to mock me when I throw out my back.
This would be cause for grounding.
Well, sure. That's just mean.
Right in the middle of it,
the attendant speaking
interrupted herself to say
"You have to sit down."
Who the heck is dumb enough
to get up when the flight's taxiing?
She started up again but quite soon,
stopped once more and:
"You have to sit down.
The plane can't take off if you're standing."
Some people are too stupid to fly.
Aw, but I was going to pretend I was surfing as the plane took off...
I'd advised many a pilot of EDCTs,
(Expect Departure Clearance Times)
but this was the first time
I was a victim of one.
I'm not really sure what that is, but it sounds bad if it makes you that late.
uh..... now I lost my train of thought.
Yup... there goes the caboose.
Bye, brain! Nice knowing ya!
And I was right!
It's open Sundays.
But
not on Mondays.
I'm oh for two here.
I'm actually impressed. They figured out a way to avoid Mondays.
Kay has a small collection
of sand from different beaches,
and I assumed they wouldn't
be closed on Mondays.
You know what happens when you assume...
Well, looky here.
Free parking on the street.
Free beats nine buck.
And is a vast improvement
over twenty.
It's like $20 cheaper!
Hang on...
(subtract nine...carry the one..square root of the third multiple exponential...)
Ok, math checks out. Carry on.
When she was born, she wasn't like that.
But when she became a teenager,
she had corrective surgery
to attach her phone to her hand.
It's been there ever since.
We peered over at the pier
that appears in one of the
above photos that some of
my peers had apparently
possibly perused.
Peerless pier perusal perpetrated perfectly.
We decided to check it out.
No reason, other than it was there.
I've heard this is why some people climb mountains.
I was disappointed to not see
Jaws appear and devour one.
You and me both. Could we at least get some piranha, or a giant octopus?
(Get the connection?
Bonus points if you tell me if you do or not.)
Sadly...I do not. I will go hang my head in shame now.
We found a shop that was advertising
50% off, so we popped in.
Kay found a top she didn't mind.
And hey! It was on sale, so...
$1,560.00
Did it come with a jacuzzi in it?
I did take photos
of stores I will never shop at, though.
Enjoy.
"Van Cleef & Arpels"? Ok, they're just making stuff up now. I bet there's not even anything in there, just a box to drop money in.
Personally, I think it's a shame
how he's been reduced
to carving the cracks
in the sidewalks.
Poor guy. Head-slicing business must not be what it used to be.
Okay, lady.
Your guy is getting jealous.
Stop looking at me and pay
attention to him.
I get that a lot.
And... You! In the white!
Turn around. Food's behind you.
You're getting a whole lot of stinkeye in that one photo. What did you say to these people?
Right?
Am I right?
Tell me whatcha think.
Bonus points.
Yes, I definitely see it! Do I win?
Anyone?
Anyone?
Bueller?
Bueller?
What were our thoughts of In-N-Out?
For a fast food chain,
it was certainly better than McDonalds.
Mind you, that's not saying much.
It was better than most
fast food chains.
But over all... I've had much better.
Still, I would go back.
But if there was a long line,
I wouldn't wait again.
I agree 100%. Good for a fast-food burger. Worth a stop. Not nearly the greatest burgers ever created. I thought the fries were lousy, too.
Speaking of burgers, did this guy ask her if she knew what they call Quarter Pounders in France?
Hey, why are my gums bleeding?
"Okay, Tiger. Visualize. See the hole?
Now... be the ball. Be the ball, Tiger."
Unfortunately, I think he misheard.
He thought I said "Be the bowel."
And his game's gone to crap ever since.
The whole stop in the museum was worth it just for that joke.
There has to be a story behind this one.
Having seen everything that LA
has to offer...
Give or take.
And we never did.
It's like it was removed
right after we spotted it.
Constant maintenance. It's like the monorail at WDW, always going down for something.
But aren't you excited about seeing
yet another photo of a couple of beds
and a bathtub?
Say yes.
Bonus points....
Yes. Because you made me.
It was still early and even though
we'd already had a full day...
We did have to have supper.
And Universal was right there.........
You'd be stupid NOT to go.
This cracked me up.
Of course in my house they'd look stupid...
But I still wanted them.
Eh, it's your house. Doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
Ok, maybe Ruby.
The scallops and Kay's side of broccoli
came fairly quickly.
(What is wrong with her?
That child ain't right!)
True confession time:
I like broccoli.
While we ate, Kay finished her water.
I asked a passing server for a refill.
Nope!
At least we waited for our water...
And that server just never came back.
Eventually, our own server showed up
and Kay got her water.
She was thirsty and drained it.
The girl whom I had originally asked
finally came back and asked Kay
if she wanted a refill.
Kay said "No thanks."
About a minute later, our server
came back and filled her glass again.
Wow, that's weird. I wonder what territorial battles are going on behind the scenes with the servers.
Completely stuffed, we waddled
back out into CityWalk.
The place is really pretty at night.
I can see that! Nice!
We popped back into the Potter store
where Kay bought some Pottery.
I gotta steal that term for my daughter.
That's why you have kids you know.
Free labour.
And when I say free,
I mean not including
the roughly quarter million dollars
that you'll spend raising them.
Ingrates. Shoulda stuck to dogs.
I look at the labor (or labour) as earning their keep. Paying me back, if you will. So far, I'm at a net $248,589.34 loss.
Somehow I knew that my random-guessing luck wasn't going to hold out forever.
1. We do actually go to Universal.
Do we:
a. purchase ($70 each)
Front of the Line passes?
b. Or do we do rope drop?
c. Or both?
I'd say rope drop. That price seems steep.
2. What's our first ride?
a. Flight of the Hippogriff
b. Forbidden Journey
c. Shrek 4D
d. The Simpsons Ride
Forbidden Journey, for the Potter fan.
3. What happens on the ride?
a. Drink spills on Kay.
b. Kid throws up.
c. Ride breaks down.
d. Lose my hat.
Ride breaks down.
4. Which (if any) of the following
do we see? (Pick up to 3)
a. Studio Tour
b. Special Effects Show
c. WaterWorld
d. Animal Actors.
e. Walking Dead Attraction
(Hint: there wasn't a Special Effects Show
at the time, and WaterWorld was being refurbed.)
Deductions for every wrong answer.
Studio Tour and Animal Actors.
5. What souvenir does Kay buy?
It's a fairly obvious one,
so no clues... except that one.
Okay... and it's more than $20.
But that's it!
Gotta be a magic wand.
6. Which one of the following
do we not ride?
a. Flight of the Hippogriff
b. King Kong 360 3-D
c. Despicable Me Minion Mayhem
d. Fast and Furious - Supercharged.
Despicable Me
7. Of the following, which is Kay's fave?
a. Jurassic Park - The Ride
b. Transformers - The Ride-3D
c. Revenge of the Mummy - The Ride
I'll go with Revenge of the Mummy.
8. Butter Beer.
Yeah, we try it.
It comes in frozen and non.
Which do we try?
a. Frozen
b. Not frozen
c. Both
Both! One for each of you so you can try them.
89 Which ride do I refuse to go on.
a. Transformers - The Ride-3D
b. The Simpsons Ride
c. Flight of the Hippogriff
d. Shrek 4D
Transformers--worried about your back, maybe?
10. Ya gotta eat. Where?
a. Suds McDuff’s Hot Dogs
b. Jurassic Café
c. Plaza Grill
d. Krusty Burger
Any self-respecting Simpsons fan would go to Krusty Burger.
11. Are you sick of this contest yet?
a. Yes.
b. No.
c. Yes. But I'm too polite to say.
d. No. But I lie a lot.
C.
Mostly because I never win these stupid things, because my guesses suck.
Bonus: Did you see it?
Of course you did.
But did you see the other one?
PM your guess.
Posting will result in deductions.
I'll get back to you....