Would you feel weird living in your grandparents home after they passed?

[Disney Doll]

First I’d look at it unsentimentally.
Is it a good house in a good area with what I need? Kitchen size good? Enough bedrooms? Enough bathrooms or space that would give me the ability to add a bathroom if I Needed to? In other words, if it wasn’t my grandparents house, would I consider buying it.?

If the answer to that question is yes, then I’d make sure the family knew that if I bought it, I’d be making some changes and updates. Someone dying in the house wouldn’t faze me, unless it was a violent death. But someone dying a peaceful happy death in their family home wouldn’t be an issue for me.

If all that worked, then I’d buy it in a heartbeat.

After my in-laws died my sister-in-law and her husband bought the house. They repainted, redid the kitchen, updated one bathroom, put on a new deck...lots of changes. But it is still nice to be able to go to the family home with all the pleasant memories.

 

[Disney Doll]

First I’d look at it unsentimentally.
Is it a good house in a good area with what I need? Kitchen size good? Enough bedrooms? Enough bathrooms or space that would give me the ability to add a bathroom if I Needed to? In other words, if it wasn’t my grandparents house, would I consider buying it.?

If the answer to that question is yes, then I’d make sure the family knew that if I bought it, I’d be making some changes and updates. Someone dying in the house wouldn’t faze me, unless it was a violent death. But someone dying a peaceful happy death in their family home wouldn’t be an issue for me.

If all that worked, then I’d buy it in a heartbeat.

After my in-laws died my sister-in-law and her husband bought the house. They repainted, redid the kitchen, updated one bathroom, put on a new deck...lots of changes. But it is still nice to be able to go to the family home with all the pleasant memories.

 

[indimom]

If I loved the home, I'd buy it. No qualms.

 

[Suger Mag]

My father passed in the home. My son lives in the same rooms where he died and has never complained about anything odd. Sometimes I swear I can smell him smoking his cigar in the garage. Friendly family ghosts are not a worry for me. I figure if they loved me in life, then that is not going to change after death.

 

[Meriweather]

I did own it for awhile......my parents had moved into it when they retired.
I sold it......too far away (another state). I would have no issues living in a house they owned though

 

[scrhsa]

I would love it! I have great memories at my grandparents. Unfortunately, it is being torn down because it hasn't been taken care of the last 40+ yrs. It was built in the late 1800's. And it was a ramshackle, patched together house that was fabulous. Funny thing is , is that I always have nightmares about that house and in particular the attic.

 

[Starport Seven-Five]

I think it would be nice, but I would make SURE that the family was okay with me making whatever changes I planned as new owner. My fear would be that family might think they have say.

If the answer to that question is yes, then I’d make sure the family knew that if I bought it, I’d be making some changes and updates.

This would be my biggest issue. It seems that everyone feels the need to give their opinion on any changes you make so it never can really be "yours."

If you have a more rational/unemotional family or you just don't care about their opinion it may be ok. If you don't have those things though you may be bringing on a lot of headaches of trying to keep everyone else happy while also making the house one you can enjoy.

 

[kaytieeldr]

All my grandparents lived in apartments, and given that they've all been gone at least 50 years, so many other tenants would have lived there by now that it wouldn't matter. But, yeah, my dad's parents lived so close and commutable to NYC, I'd live there. My mom's parents, well, my aunt and her family did move in there!

 

[MrsJackSparrow4Life]

Wouldn’t bother me, in fact I kind of wish I had a family home to buy. My brother and SIL bought her grandmother’s house after she passed. The family told them they would sell it to them at whatever amount they could get approved for so they got the house for $150,000 less than houses in that neighborhood are selling for normally. They have just as much house and twice as much land as my husband and I do and their mortgage is $1000 less.

 

[NYCgrrl]

I'd love living in Nana and Papa's house; Grandmother's not so much.
I prefer well loved older homes to the lower standard building construction of newer ones though.

 

[tvguy]

I faced that when my mom passed away 6 years ago. I was 3 when we moved into that house, my mom had lived there 53 years. I lived in that house 22 years It is 6 miles from my house that at the time I had lived in for 30 years and raised my kids in. Mom's house was 1700 square feet, mine 2,010. Mom's house was just like walking into 1960, right down to the pink tile in the bathroom. It looked new. My house was like walking into 1979, basic contractor's grade well worn. Original 34 year old carpet.
Because of the location my mom's house was worth twice what mine was. And I couldn't bare to remodel my parents home, so we sold mom's, and spent more than we paid for our house remodeling it.
My grandparents, well, on my dad's side, they both passed away 36 years before I was born, and back in 1921 the rental agreement (which we found) didn't even list a street address, it just said "at the corner of Grand and Main Street". So no attachment there.
On my mom's side, it was a farm house that nobody has lived in since 4 years before I was born. I have been to it, it was about to fall over, and has since been intentionally burned down by the current owner. No electricity, no plumbing, no thanks.

 

[Jennasis]

I lived in my grandparents house for a while as an adult (with my then-boyfriend, now-DH). It was fine.

 

[bigbabyblues]

We bought DH's grandparents house when they moved out of it (they were still alive at the time but needed a 1-story home). It was originally DH's great-grandparents' home, they had it built in the 1930's. No one died here, or even while living here. The house had been sold to the next generation and they moved to smaller homes. We spent several weeks stripping wallpaper, painting, changing flooring, etc before we moved in. Keep in mind, we were young and newly married--i.e., poor, so we made bigger changes over time. We have been here for 21 years and it is now our home, although some of the special touches are here, like the floor to ceiling bookcases DH's grandpa built by hand and put in the family room, and the built-in china hutch in the dining room that DH's great-grandmother loved.

 

[Squirlz]

I lived with my Aunt while I went to college and slept in the bed my Grandmother died in. Never really thought about it.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

We still live in the house that my grandparents bought in 1973. My mother and I have been here since '76. Grandpa died in 1998 and Gram passed away in the living room in 2007. We're still 3 generations in the house - my mom, DH and I, and our son. We've remodeled the kitchen, dining room, and enclosed porch; my mom feels they would be pleased with the changes we've made. DH and I have my grandmother's old bedroom - even her furniture! - while our son is in my childhood bedroom. It's a relatively large house (paid off in 1997), well-made, 1/2-acre backyard, one of the more coveted neighborhoods in our town...

It was a no-brainer for us. I think they'd be happy that we're still here and that their great-grandson will grow up in the house. I've never felt weird about anything, honestly, but maybe because I grew up here to begin with.

 

[DVC-Don]

Be only weird if the bath fixtures were pink or green.

 

[bigbabyblues]

Be only weird if the bath fixtures were pink or green.

Our upstairs bathroom had a purple sink, tub and toilet when we bought the house. Those were the first things to go!

 

[Colleen27]

I would love to live in my grandparents' house, if the opportunity arose at the right time. My mother lives in it now, and it does need a lot of updating, but it is a really nice home for an older adult (3/2 ranch with a finished basement) in a quiet suburb that I wouldn't choose for raising a family but that has a lot to offer in terms of senior activities and services. Both of my grandparents and my brother did die in the house, and that last still gives me pause sometimes, but I don't think it would stop me from living there. My grandparents both lived long lives; their passings were expected and they both wanted to die in the family home rather than in a hospital or facility, so I've never felt strange about them dying in their own room there.

ETA: In my case, there is no family left that would weigh in on changes I made or complain about us putting our stamp on the home - the only way I'd end up living there is if my mother passes away without needing to sell, and I'm her only surviving child. She has one sibling, who lives 700 miles away and has for the last 40+ years, and my two 30-something cousins on that side of the family spent maybe a total of 10 days in our grandparents' home in their entire lives so I doubt they'd have any strong feelings on the matter. So I wouldn't have to factor in the emotional baggage/pressure to keep things unchanged. I could see that being a deal-breaker in some families.

 

[bigbabyblues]

ETA: In my case, there is no family left that would weigh in on changes I made or complain about us putting our stamp on the home - the only way I'd end up living there is if my mother passes away without needing to sell, and I'm her only surviving child. She has one sibling, who lives 700 miles away and has for the last 40+ years, and my two 30-something cousins on that side of the family spent maybe a total of 10 days in our grandparents' home in their entire lives so I doubt they'd have any strong feelings on the matter. So I wouldn't have to factor in the emotional baggage/pressure to keep things unchanged. I could see that being a deal-breaker in some families.

This is why we bought the house from DH's grandparents the way we did, instead of having it as DH's inheritance or some kind of land contract or something. They sold it, we bought it at full price, and it is our house to do with as we see fit. I don't think anyone in his family would have had an issue with anything we did anyway, but you never know in families.

 

[WDWBarb]

I would live there, but I'd be a bit creeped out... because my grandmother said, on her death bed, that she was going to haunt me.

So far, nothing. But I haven't given up yet! Maybe she's just found a good game of Rook over there and hasn't gotten around to it.