When do you stop paying for your kids' cruises?

[kaseyC]

We will continue to pay as long as they are willing/able to travel with us.

 

[Cruising Engineer]

Right now yes. Because I still want a family vacation with them and they can't afford it. They are both working full time, but do not have enough left over for a Disney trip. Once they are making enough money to save for it and pay themselves - no. It will be on them.

I agree with you. An accountant, engineer, and an airline pilot, they each make more a month than we get for retirement. That's why the bank and TA services are closed.

 

[Princess_Iliana_of_Avalor]

Usually when I travel with my parents they pay for me, however, we’ve become too busy to travel as a family and the biggest thing we do is drive up to Vegas for a weekend lol. However, I feel like they shouldn’t pay for me anymore if we were to go on another big vacation. My boyfriend and I (we’re both 21) have begun traveling on our own and pay for it out of our own pockets. My parents have done A LOT for me so I feel like the least I could do is start paying my way for a vacation with them. My circumstances may also be a little different though. I live with my parents, they pay for my school, they pay for my phone, and practically anything I really need. I always pay for things I want because I think that’s only fair. My parents also told me that I’ll be having to pay for my own cell phone once I graduate in the spring which I also find fair. If it was up to me I would pay them back every cent they’ve ever spent on me lol, but sadly money doesn’t grow on trees.
I think everything really just depends on the situation and what you’re comfortable paying. I find nothing wrong with after a certain age telling your kid you need to start paying for yourself, it’s all a part of growing up and becoming independent.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Trying to decide if I'm going to pay for my oldest daughter's cruise in 2020. She's going to be taking a gap year and working part time. I'm torn. I want to, but money doesn't grow on trees in our house. Curious what other people do/think.

Funny, there was a thread running on the Community Board recently regarding this issue.

My take? If the child(adult) is supporting him or herself then they pay for their vacation. If the child is still at home being supported by parents, then I'd probably pay. Best of both, you pay for the cruise, but she pays for any extras she wants (excursions, drinks, souvenirs, whatever)

 

[Joe Brig]

A cruise is an extreme luxury item for many young people. They probably have other financial priorities, like paying off debt, saving for a house, family, and retirement. I didn't take a vacation until I was in my 30s. How much is it worth to the parent to have the kid with them on a cruise?

 

[mmouse37]

Our three adult children all have great jobs, with spouses they have great jobs. Even with that if we have the money to treat them we will....if not the whole cost then some. Sometime they pay for themselves. It does not always happen that way but we really enjoy spending time traveling with our kids and grandkids so if we can we do.

Two years ago Netflix used our home to film a series and we got a chunk of change....I told the family before our house was chosen that if we did get picked then I would treat for the cruise that year. Our house was picked and we paid for the cruise for them.

Our kids are very appreciative and would never expect us to pay for anything...if they did I would never do it.

MJ

 

[MomOTwins]

I agree with you. An accountant, engineer, and an airline pilot, they each make more a month than we get for retirement. That's why the bank and TA services are closed.

This raises a good point, which is that eventually the tables may be turned. Although my parents pay when we vacation with them, I was considering inviting my in-laws to cruise with us and we would pay for the cruise. I think it would be nice for them to enjoy a disney experience with their grandkids, but I wouldn't want them to strain their finances since they've been though a lot, and we make more than they do. OP's daughter is obviously not there yet (since she would just be a part-time employed student at the time of the cruise), but one day it would probably make more sense for her to pay her way, and perhaps even foot the bill for OP

 

[Disneyhenry]

I pay for 1 family vacation about every 3 years

 

[Disneyhenry]

Our three adult children all have great jobs, with spouses they have great jobs. Even with that if we have the money to treat them we will....if not the whole cost then some. Sometime they pay for themselves. It does not always happen that way but we really enjoy spending time traveling with our kids and grandkids so if we can we do.

Two years ago Netflix used our home to film a series and we got a chunk of change....I told the family before our house was chosen that if we did get picked then I would treat for the cruise that year. Our house was picked and we paid for the cruise for them.

Our kids are very appreciative and would never expect us to pay for anything...if they did I would never do it.

MJ

That’s is really cool! Was it the Haunting of Hill House ?? Just kidding! That’s really cool they chose your house! Even cooler you took your family on DCL

 

[Travel60]

We live several hours from both kids. They grew up on Disney and Disney Cruises so us paying is an easy bribe to get them to come and for us to spend time with grandchildren.

Last family cruise, we paid for cruise, group excursions and airfare. Anything they spent on board (gifts, booze, etc) or something else on shore was on them. We are fortunate to be able financially to do this and would rather see them enjoying life now than after we are dead.

 

[wilbret]

In our family, the grands invite the kids and grandkids on an annual holiday, their treat. We have tried to pay for trips in the past, but our folks won't hear of it... going so far as to sneak cash in your wallet if you try to slip cash to them lol.

I'll do the same for our kids, for as long as they want to vacation with us. I hope they'll do the same. It makes sense to me, in that young families might not have disposable income to spend.

If you can afford it, and want to do it... do it. Make sure they understand it's a gift. If you want to do it, and can't afford it...make sure it's clear what you expect them to pay for.

 

[ludari]

I don't have any kids so I never have to pay for them. However I do have an interesting story about paying for someone else. As a solo cruiser I have to pay nearly for a second occupant even though I'm cruising solo so I once invited my sister. I told her that I will cover the expense for the cruise, hotels and food pre/post cruise and all she would have to do is pay for her roundtrip flight. Her response... I should give up my first class flights (I used my miles to upgrade) and pay for her flights. I laughed and told her to forget the offer I would rather be alone. I guess it's true that no good deed goes unpunished. My only hope is that the future Disney Ships will offer single cabins for solo cruisers like other cruise lines do.

 

[mmouse37]

That’s is really cool! Was it the Haunting of Hill House ?? Just kidding! That’s really cool they chose your house! Even cooler you took your family on DCL

I wish it was the Haunting of Hill House!!!!! Loved that house! It was a series called the OA about a girl who is blind and goes missing but comes back years later with sight. It had Scott Wilson of Walking Dead fame (RIP).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_OA

MJ

 

[darnheather]

I wish it was the Haunting of Hill House!!!!! Loved that house! It was a series called the OA about a girl who is blind and goes missing but comes back years later with sight. It had Scott Wilson of Walking Dead fame (RIP).

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_OA

MJ

I loved that series!

 

[Dug720]

This raises a good point, which is that eventually the tables may be turned. Although my parents pay when we vacation with them, I was considering inviting my in-laws to cruise with us and we would pay for the cruise. I think it would be nice for them to enjoy a disney experience with their grandkids, but I wouldn't want them to strain their finances since they've been though a lot, and we make more than they do. OP's daughter is obviously not there yet (since she would just be a part-time employed student at the time of the cruise), but one day it would probably make more sense for her to pay her way, and perhaps even foot the bill for OP

Yes... I was fortunate to be able to take my parents on the Magic with me in 2017 thanks to a settlement from a class action suit that involved some student loans I'd had (clearly not government-based). They've done so much for me, I was happy to be able to do something for them.

This year, my sister and I split the cost of a cruise to Alaska on the Wonder for our parents for their 50th Anniversary. It was an inside cabin (which she managed to get upgraded to an ocean view and then a verandah - making me feel very inadequate, but it is what it is), but they were so appreciative.

And for next summer, I've reserved a beach house for myself, my parents, and my sister if she's on her vacation with the company we've used since I was in 7th grade. My dad has said that they will pay half, and I won't fight him on it because he wants to do that. But yeah...eventually the tables turn.

 

[DisLiss]

It depends on if you can afford to pay their way and how badly you want them on the cruise with you.

If you really want a family cruise, and your adult child either doesn't make enough to comfortably cover the cost or simply doesn't wish to spend their own hard-earned money on a cruise, then the only options are that they do not go or you pay their way.

If the adult child can possibly pay for part of the trip or the entire trip and you are willing to go without them if they cannot come up with an amount you agree is appropriate, then I think it's fine to ask them to pay their way or part of their way.

I think it really depends on individual families and individual trip timing.

 

[mmouse37]

I loved that series!

Our house was the one where Prairie and her parents lived. They totally redecorated our house to look like the 80's and then put everything back the way it was....it was incredible the work they did.

MJ

 

[k3chantal]

Trying to decide if I'm going to pay for my oldest daughter's cruise in 2020. She's going to be taking a gap year and working part time. I'm torn. I want to, but money doesn't grow on trees in our house. Curious what other people do/think.

My husband and I always said that we would stop.......now we have a 19 year old. We had such a wonderful trip last year with him (and his siblings) that we are taking him again this summer. I do think we would feel differently if we were cruising out of the United States but in Europe we found he didn't hang out with others in his age group as much so he stayed with us and was completely wonderful. He made me proud to be his mother.

 

[we"reofftoneverland]

This is a great discussion topic! Thanks for opening it darnheather.

I am torn on this. On one hand I always want our kids to feel loved and included. One the other hand 1) I do not want to change their behavior with money, and 2) I want them to suffer a bit and understand how much life costs.

I suspect we may continue to pay for one a year for our kids after college, but not positive because I never want my kids to come for the free vacation. If they do not want to come, I would prefer them not to come. I have already been there with one teen. Dh says he is ready to dump him from vacations already. Lol. But seriously, I think at some point kids have to become adults and that it is important for them to have their own lives. I also am not sure how much we as parents should subsidize their decisions. If one insists on majoring in liberal arts and ends up basically jobless after college, should we pay for them to go on relatively expensive vacations? At that point I think it would be good for them to hit the proverbial reality wall. And then do you keep vacationing with the younger kids in the family? Tough questions. Not sure what the answer is here.

 

[Big Mo]

I was 16 during the last parent-paid trip I took. As an adult, my mom routinely expresses a desire to go with us but doesn't even want to pay for herself. LOL

Seems like I'm in the minority tho, at least wrt expensive travel. I have plenty of adult friends who travel internationally on their parents' dime. Also, when I was a young adult footing my own bills, other travelers would routinely assume that the trip was a wedding gift and such.