Sue, I can understand how you feel when people think that your daughter is "faking" being in a wheelchair, when they see her out of it. I'm able to transfer out of my wheelchairs on my own, by crawling out of them, or with my mom's help when making a standing transfer.
I wonder if people judge wheelchair users, just by how their seating system is set-up, and the more "seating accessories" the seating system has, the more "disabled" that person may appear. The seating system in my power chair, looks like it could be used for someone with Cerebral Palsy, rather than someone with orthopedic challenges, and Dystonia, with the headrest, chest posture belt, and padded hip belt (who can't sit up very well in her chair, and without the headrest, who would have poor head control).
My manual wheelchair just has a special sling-type back that's fully padded, along with the same kind of cushion and seat belt as in my power chair. It also has one of those stroller handle extensions that "snap" in and out of the push handles when the chair needs to be folded (as it's mostly used for airline travel, since it's an ultra-lightweight wheelchair, or for places where taking my power chair would be difficult), for my 6' 2" fiance' to easily push me, without having to bend over. He loves it, since it's so easy for him to push me around, and when we were at Disney World this last time, a lot of people got a kick out of how he was pushing me around the parks most of the time, with my manual wheelchair tipped back on it's back wheels, and him swinging me from side to side, trying to get me to laugh. I was embarrassed by all of this, and trying to hide myself. My goony godfather and brother both loved "egging Dan on" with how Dan was pushing me around, and embarrassing the heck out of me.
This last time at Disney, when Dan and I were alone, we did have a few problems with people running right in front of us, and them getting hurt with my angle-adjustable footplates on my manual wheelchair (and power wheelchair too), to which it would make both of us feel bad. But, there were some people who saw us as "a cute couple" just because of the way we were, and offered their assistance in every way possible. The exciting part for us, was seeing their reactions when we told them that we were going to get married next summer.
Samantha