Mom passed away this morning

[nana2tots]

 

[antmaril]

I am very sorry for your loss.

 

[rlduvall]

I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my mother recently (12/6/07) to lung cancer. Mom had been in a coma a few days. When I received the call at 3:30 a.m. that her breathing had become more labored I rushed over there (but it still took 30 minutes). She was surrounded by my stepfather, brother and several close friends who helped us care for her. I went to her, took her hand and two breaths later she was gone. I will always believe she waited for me (and knew she was surrounded by her loved ones), like your mother did for you. Somehow it is comforting.

Please accept my most heartfelt sympathy and empathy.

 

[Rustysmom]

Thank you everyone. We buried her this morning. It was very hard, but I think she looked beautiful. We buried her in the dress she wore to my wedding. She hadn't been able to wash her hair in months, and it finally got washed and dyed. She would be happy. Maybe not happy about the hairstyle because she always wore it curly and they made it straight, but they did what they could because it was too long to curl. Everyone was shocked that she was 83 because she had no wrinkles. All she ever used was baby oil. I wish I had her no wrinkles genes.

Then this afternoon my cousin Joey, who was here from the night before she died, and his partner took us on a tour of Mom's and my Aunt's old neighborhood, and saw their old houses and their church. They were very devout Catholics and were always in that church. In the church they were having some kind of prayer meeting, and two ladies gave us big hugs for no reason and said "God bless you". Maybe Mom sent them. We felt better after that.

Tomorrow we are going to her house and try to straighten stuff up and then decide what to do about it. I know I'm going to cry when I walk in there. I can't wait until they come and pick up that stupid hospital bed. Whether to try to pay off her reverse mortgage somehow, or sell it within the year. I'd rather do the first option. Then we are going to spend some time with her cat Penny.

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

Hi Mary....know that we are still thinking & praying for you.

 

[Mskanga]

I am so sorry for your loss , my prayers go out to all of you to find strength to get through this . HUGS

 

[Mackey Mouse]

Mary... I am so glad that she had a beautiful Memorial service.....it has to be comforting knowing how well she looked after what she went through..

Hugs and stay well, I am posting this quickly from a friend's computer while on vacation.. I will be back to my post on Saturday... stay well everyone....

 

[TaraPA]

Mary I'm so sorry you're going through this right now. Please don't forget to take time to care for yourself. You're emotionally & physically drained, you don't want to get sick on top of it. Eat healthy, sleep when you can & let others help you.

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

Mary, something that helped me during times of loss was a simple walk.....clears your mind a bit. Also, allow people to care and comfort you. Today DH & I drove to Queens to take my Aunt to brunch, she lost her son (my beloved cousin) about 6 weeks ago. I could tell when I called her Friday she really hesitated but it turned out to be a very nice afternoon...of course their are going to be tears but having people that love you around can really hold you up when you need it.....Just a suggestion I wanted to share with you

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I'm sorry.

 

[fan of the TTA]

i'm sorry as well. how aweful

 

[agnes!]

I am so sorry for your loss. Even though it was not an easy thing to do, when my FIL passed away it's a great comfort to my DH & I to have been there with FIL.

agnes!

 

[julm26]

I just read your post and want to say how very sorry I am, I will keep you in my prayers throughout hese difficult days. If you ever need to talk please pm me, I know what you are going through - it has only been a month and a half since my mom died from PC.

 

[TruBlu]

So sorry.

 

[NHAnn]

I'm so sorry for your loss

 

[TaraPA]

Mary - how are you doing these days? I've been thinking about you & just wanted to let you know.

 

[Rustysmom]

Thanks. I'm not sure how I'm doing. I still can't believe she's gone and I still cry at any given time throughout the day. I just want to pick up the phone and call her so bad. We had her phone disconnected the other day and I still dial it. I used to call her at certain times and if I didn't, she'd worry about me, and I just realized that now I have nobody to worry about me.

I haven't been feeling well lately. My back has been hurting and my stomach feels sore, and then I get scared thinking that I have what she had, but I think it's just all from the stress (I hope).

We are keeping busy trying to clean up her house because now the reverse mortgage people are telling me I have 6 months to sell it. I thought it was a year. They said I do have up to a year but I have to prove that I have it listed by 6 months. She never even got to enjoy the money she got from the reverse mortgage either. It's not easy cleaning up more than 40 years worth of stuff and I just want to keep everything, but I can't.

I still don't know what to do with her cat Penny. Mom wanted us to put her to sleep when she died, but I can't do it. She'll have to come live with us, but where? I have 2 cats and she doesn't get along with other cats, plus she isn't well. She's 12 and has bad glaucoma in one eye for which she has to take pills twice a day, and it's starting in the other. She really misses my mom and cries and cries for her.

 

[THUNDERMOUNTAINMOMMA]

Mary...I know we've never met, but I will say a prayer for you tonight. I'm so very sorry for the pain you've been through and continue to feel. I'm wishing you peace and healing.
~Karen

 

[daisy2]

Thanks. I'm not sure how I'm doing. I still can't believe she's gone and I still cry at any given time throughout the day. I just want to pick up the phone and call her so bad. We had her phone disconnected the other day and I still dial it. I used to call her at certain times and if I didn't, she'd worry about me, and I just realized that now I have nobody to worry about me.

I haven't been feeling well lately. My back has been hurting and my stomach feels sore, and then I get scared thinking that I have what she had, but I think it's just all from the stress (I hope).

We are keeping busy trying to clean up her house because now the reverse mortgage people are telling me I have 6 months to sell it. I thought it was a year. They said I do have up to a year but I have to prove that I have it listed by 6 months. She never even got to enjoy the money she got from the reverse mortgage either. It's not easy cleaning up more than 40 years worth of stuff and I just want to keep everything, but I can't.

I still don't know what to do with her cat Penny. Mom wanted us to put her to sleep when she died, but I can't do it. She'll have to come live with us, but where? I have 2 cats and she doesn't get along with other cats, plus she isn't well. She's 12 and has bad glaucoma in one eye for which she has to take pills twice a day, and it's starting in the other. She really misses my mom and cries and cries for her.

Hi Mary,
I know how you feel about wanting to pick up the phone and call your mom. I used to do the same thing. I also know how it feels about little things that remind you of her. My mom lived in Oregon and I lived in California, it was so hard if I was making something like a baked chicken I would automatically pick up the phone to call her to ask her what spices to put on it and how long to bake it. Certain songs on the radio would play and I would have to pull over to the side of the road because it reminded me of her. I can't say it gets any easier but I always try to remember she will always be in my heart and I have so many memories of her. I hope it gets better for you. In time you will realize that you have done the best for your mom and she appreciates it. God bless to you and your family.
-Daisy2

 

[LeahA]

Mary,

We will get through this. I know it seems so unreal, it's been 11 days since my mom has passed, it's a strange feeling, that's all I can say to people who haven't experienced it yet. I'll say a prayer for both of us.