~ In Memory Of Sylvia ~

[Snowwark]

A year ago today, Sylvia Murray lost her valiant struggle against breast cancer. Most of us only knew Sylvia through her posts on the Dis, but her kind heart, sense of fun, courage, and most of all, her love for her young son Nick, shone through her words.

When Sylvia passed away, Vanessa (Amid Chaos), suggested we plant perennials as a tribute to Sylvia. On last year's Garden Me This thread, some of us took up Vanessa's wonderful idea and planted flowers that will come back every year, to remind us, sometimes with a tear, but hopefully with a smile too, of a woman who touched so many hearts.

Please join me in remembering Sylvia today, with a thought, a picture, poem, or special memory.

~ A beautiful blossom is a fleeting thing
It stays for a moment and then takes wing.
With special rays we catch it ere flight
So all may enjoy the beautiful sight. ~

- Albert Richards

 

[gina2000]

When Sylvia died, the world stopped on the Dis. It was a moment I will never forget. She touched our lives in so many different ways. Her memory lives on with us through our thoughts, our dream, and our fears.

I took these poems from a children's book, "Walk a Green Path" by Betsy Lewin. Sylvia loved her little boy, Nick, immensely and I'm sure his pain is great today. This is for him.


Moonvine

Soft white flowers glow in a green night.

At dawn a barred owl sails without sound to its bed.

Soon the moonflowers will be tight white fists.



The Holly Bench

I left the corner luncheonette

and took my lemonade across the street.

Sitting in the walled garden.

I poked the straw throught the lid.

Gone -- the August heat,

the city's metal voice.



Lotus

Lotus.

The word floats from my tongue,

whispers in my ears.

In the leafy dream below the blossom,

I see ancient Egypt.

 

[Mamu]

Although I never meet Sylvia I remember her posting.

I also remember the pictures Dan Murphy posted of her. Those pictures have left an imprint in my mind of the special person Sulvia was.

Being part of the "Garden Me" thread I planted a White Astilbe along a path on the back side of the water garden. It's one of my favorite spots. I walk this path many times a day, often stop brush the leaves and think of Sylvia and her family and her valiant fight. The flower is not blooming yet, but it has developed into a beautiful plant.

 

[oldkicker]

Sylvia reached out to me before she passed away. She had read about Sharon's fight against cancer and felt a connection. We passed messages back and forth for some time.

We talked about lots of things. She told me of the pain she was in, but she never spoke of feeling sorry for herself. She offered up words of courage and help to me. We talked about her son Nick. We shared stories of kids and soccer. We found out that Canadian youth soccer and American youth soccer are very similar.

One day the messages stopped.

Days later I read the post from Dan. Sylvia had passed away.

After reading about Amid's idea in the Garden Me This thread, I felt that planting a perennial would be a wonderful idea. I talked it over with Sharon and we decided on a purple coneflower.

We planted it next to the walk in one of the front gardens.

Weeks later, I was terrible excited as I was planning to attend a DIS meet in Toronto. Kim, I was excited to be meeting a couple of riddle buds as well as other DISers. You and our friends Len and Baboo.

As I was packing the car to leave, I noticed that the coneflower had picked that very day to bloom. It was almost as if Sylvia was stopping by to say hello and wish me well on my travels to her homeland.

The coneflower is thrving this year. In fact, it looks as if it has propagated itself. Our garden will be full of memories this year.

I found this passage a while back, and I think it's appropriate today....

On Dying

I am standing on the seashore.

A ship spreads his white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the ocean.
I stand watching him until he fades on the horizon, and someone at my side says,

"He is gone."

Gone where? The loss of sight is in me, not in him.
Just at that moment when someone says,
"He is gone," there are others who are watching him coming.
Other voices take up the glad shout,

"Here he comes!"

and that is dying.

©Henry Scott Holland

We miss you, Sylvia.

 

[amid chaos]

Sylvia and I connected thru the DIS and the mail. She posted one day about her concern about how to get Nick to floss his teeth. I picked her up several packages of Dino-floss, an item easy and fun for little hands to use and mailed them off.
Then when she was in the hospital for the last time I sent cards and some books and stuff for Nick. The last package was these tiny little magnet people. A girl and a child. I pictured them interacting with them in the hospital, something to laugh about together. I don't know if she ever received them as she died a week later.
I have a white coneflower planted in her memory among my purple ones. She will stand out like she did here on the DIS with her kindness and gentle nature.

 

[Snowwark]

These are so beautiful, the poems, the kind gestures........

In our garden we planted a Pink Tickseed Coreopsis, appropriately named Sweet Dreams to honour Sylvia.

Here's a picture of it from last year.

 

[Patrick IL.]

The small coneflower I planted still lives, The harsh sping has prevented a bloom at this point but on is coming I am sure. I surround it with fresh annuals every spring. I never met Sylvia either, but I felt her kindness and spirt. Her suffering and death united the site in a special way I will never forget. Her family remains in my prayers and thoughts everytime I look at her little garden.

Do not stand on my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in the circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
- Anonymous

 

[DixieDreamer]

I believe that a truly worthy life - be it short or long - will result in many people holding the memory of that person with great sadness and love - for years to come. Sylvia touched many lives. She was loved. And her memory is alive and vibrant among the many people who were fortunate enough to have her life touch theirs.

<center>A TRULY WORTHY LIFE</center>

As a member of the garden group on the DIS, I too selected a flower to plant in my garden - to honor Sylvia. I chose a purple coneflower - echinacea. It is a plant known for it's healing properties and carefree beauty. It seemed a fitting plant for Sylvia. I planted it amongst the many other purple coneflowers in my garden. It does not stand out from the crowd, but instead is a vibrant part of my garden community - just as she was part of the community that brought her into my life - the DIS.

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Her flower is part of a sea of purple coneflowers in my garden.

To the world it is just another beautiful prairie flower in my garden of wild abandon. Yet as I walk the garden path on a warm summer evening, I stop and admire the singular beauty of this resilient and beautiful individual. Sylvia is truly represented in my garden.

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She will be remembered.

 

[Tulirose]

I only knew Sylvia mostly from her postings on the Survivor Thread. I actually had no clue that she was ill until shortly prior to her passing when a posting by Dan came to my attention. I participated also in the Garden Thread's memorial tribute to her by getting a Shasta Daisy in her memory. It was a beautiful plant which unfortunately did not survive. I think it pretty amazing that I still pass that spot and think of Sylvia. I have been in the process of trying to decide what I should put there to replace the plant when I get the chance. Whatever goes there, or even if nothing goes there, the tribute is still there for her because I still remember. May she rest in peace.

 

[sammi]

I "met" Sylvia on the Canadian Board and she helped me greatly with my trip planning.I enjoyed her keen sense of humour too! LOL

I was so shocked to hear of her illness and subsequent passing. She was a real fighter and never gave up right to the end of her short life. She is still very much a part of these boards and will continue to be always.

I planted a gorgeous lilly that is on it's way back to life. It's really nice to be able to be reminded of her each time I'm working in my garden.

Rest in peace dear Sylvia and may your family find peace in your passing also.

~Cindy

 

[Snowwark]

I was home alone one winter evening and decided to have a Dis cyber open house. Sylvia stopped by and offered to bring nail polish so the "chicks" could paint each other's toenails. I asked her to bring along some of her Mother's sauerbraten, a dish she had mentioned as being one of her favourite meals.

As Tulirose mentioned, Sylvia enjoyed Survivor, and even helped me to cheer on the sometimes hapless Toronto Maples Leafs on a thread started by Jeff in Big D.

We have not forgotten.

What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night.
It is the breath of a buffalo in the wintertime.
It is the little shadow which runs across the grass
And loses itself in the sunset.

- Crowfoot, Blackfoot Indian, 1890

 

[TimNDansMom]

I met Sylvia, in her helpful replies to my messages on the Canadian board, when I was planning a trip to WDW. I, too, enjoyed reading her many other posts and her sense of humour. I was shocked to hear that she was ill and her passing touched my heart. Her bravery reminded me of a dear friend, also with a young son, who lost her life to the same illness, in that same hospital.

I had just planted a young Beauty Bush, which, as it's name suggests, is absolutely gorgeous when it is in full bloom. I decided that this would be the perfect tribute to Sylvia and I always think of the beautiful person I know she was, when I walk by it. Perfect timing, some of it's first flowers are beginning to open today.

"Grow little flower for love you do I,
Live in my garden and bloom in the sky. " - Micah E Brinkley

 

[yepod]

I just wanted to thank all of you lovely people for sharing your thoughts, with us who didn't know this great lady.

 

[kathymc]

while I remember Sylvia and her passing - I did not partake in the Garden me Thread last year. I am planting some perrinials this weekend and will go out and plant one tonight in memory of Sylvia.

 

[Beanie]

I only knew Sylvia for a short time, but I always admired her and was very saddened by her passing...I wrote this poem a while ago and it seems so fitting for this board...

We have not forgotten...



<font color=blue><b>A Flower Lying Under The Snow</b>

Every person is born,
With their destiny to die,
Some earlier then others,
Everyone left to wonder why.

A beautiful woman with stars in her eyes,
Leaves sprinklings of stardust on those she has touched,
Has left us in mystery,
Having loved her so much.

Like a flower lying under the snow,
When Spring came she had no chance to grow,
But when we start to cry,
We must remember why,
This one person, Sylvia,
Was meant to blossom in the sky.</font>

 

[Snowwark]

Beanie, that's a beautiful poem!

 

[Mamu]

Lovely poem Beanie.

 

[NHMickey]

Beanie... That was beautiful... Thank you for sharing it.

 

[Patrick IL.]

Beanie, what a wonderful poem

 

[Mamu]

After reading Dan post on the Community Board thought this post could use a bump.

My thought today are with Sylvia Family and her son Nick. Somehow it doesn't seem like 18 months.

Sylvia you are in my thoughts today. As you are on just about every spring and summer day as I walk my garden path lightly brushing my fingers across the plant, always wondering, thinking and praying for Nick.