??? about Santa, Princesses, etc. from ASD kiddo;

[ireland_nicole]

O.K., I feel odd asking this, but really am wondering what ya'll do about this. Both of my kids are very concrete in their thinking (and gullible). They love Santa, and Mickey and Friends, and the Princesses. The problem is, DD is almost 9. And the kids in her class are, shall we say, not fans so to speak. Recently, Mickey and the Princesses sent postcards from WDW (thanks olboshoi) after they had a bunch of new medical procedures, etc. Well, they took them to school and were soooo excited. The kids in the class made sure to share their opinions re: their authenticity. So they asked me who was correct. I, of course, said, of course that's the real mickey! You saw him, didn't ya? You saw his house- he does live there.

So here's the question. Is this a good idea? or not? One of the "advantages" of autism is that, quite frankly, my kids aren't really bothered about what the others think. But am I doing a disservice to my guys by encouraging a "belief" that is different from peers?

Thanks, Nicole

 

[sdarwkcabemanmy]

Personally, I think the longer you can get them to believe, the better. Growing up, we didn't really believe in Santa Claus and I think that because of that, I missed out on a lot of magic. We knew who he WAS, but we didn't believe in him and to me, that's part of the magic of Christmas. Just like BELIEVING in Mickey, the princesses, etc is part of the magic of Disney.

 

[LMC]

I'd say let them believe as long as you can. My DS13 still believes in everything. His is ASD, cognitively delayed, etc but still believes in Santa, easter bunny and the whole works. He even thinks that the robotic Capt'n Jack Sparrow on the POTC ride is THE real Capt'n Jack and he runs behind the walls to his next post just for our boat so we can see him. Forget about all the other boats in front or behind us that miss their chance to see him if you follow his logic but I tried to explain and he is adamant that the robot IS real.

 

[ireland_nicole]

Thanks, I was hoping that I wasn't causing any more irreperable harm than usual LOL. At least I'm not the only one. I think I'll continue on as I have been. I have to admit, I think it really is sweet.

 

[kaffinito]

I think it's great! So what if they believe in things like Mickey or Cinderella or Santa longer than other kids? that just means that they have the "magic" longer than others. They are the lucky ones!

My oldest boy believed in Santa until he was 14. I agreed with him after he presented his evidence against Santa, and told him about the Magic that adults get to share in by "playing" Santa. Now he's right up there with me, playing Santa for his little brother, and helping me do special things to keep John's "magic" going. It was Ben's idea to put down reindeer food and then leave deer tracks one year for John to find.

So it's my stance to let the kids believe as long as they can. Maybe once they find out that Mickey and the Princesses aren't "real" (because real is such a subjective term) they can see what "real" means to others and encourage their magic.

 

[ireland_nicole]

Thanks Kaffanito; you know, it's really funny that I posted this now, b/c tomorrow the kids have to dress as what they want to be when they grow up. Well, DS says he's gonna wear his marine fatigues (Just like Uncle Joey) and DD announces she's gonna wear one of her princess dresses. So I said, Honey, do you think you're going to BE a princess when you grow up? And she looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Of course not, Mom- I going to work at Disney World!" I'm not sure if she "gets" it or not, but hey, you gotta admit her answer was classic!

 

[kaffinito]

Thanks Kaffanito; you know, it's really funny that I posted this now, b/c tomorrow the kids have to dress as what they want to be when they grow up. Well, DS says he's gonna wear his marine fatigues (Just like Uncle Joey) and DD announces she's gonna wear one of her princess dresses. So I said, Honey, do you think you're going to BE a princess when you grow up? And she looked at me like I was nuts and said, "Of course not, Mom- I going to work at Disney World!" I'm not sure if she "gets" it or not, but hey, you gotta admit her answer was classic!

Too funny!!! Kids are really surprising sometimes, aren't they?

 

[dunbarfamily]

I applaud the OP for allowing her children to beleive. Of course, I know the "secret" but I still pretend I don't! I hope my children will believe for a long time. Children are forced to grow up so fast now, so the longer they believe, the better, in my opinion. Let them enjoy it! They will figure it all out later, but for now, let's let our children enjoy being children and all the stuff that goes along with childhood.


My small print disclaimer in case someone doesn't think I belong here.....I'm just dropping in here....I don't have a kiddo with a dx condition, but I do have several close friends with children who have ASD.

 

[KirstenB]

I applaud the OP for allowing her children to beleive. Of course, I know the "secret" but I still pretend I don't! I hope my children will believe for a long time. Children are forced to grow up so fast now, so the longer they believe, the better, in my opinion. Let them enjoy it! They will figure it all out later, but for now, let's let our children enjoy being children and all the stuff that goes along with childhood.


My small print disclaimer in case someone doesn't think I belong here.....I'm just dropping in here....I don't have a kiddo with a dx condition, but I do have several close friends with children who have ASD.

You don't have to have a disability to hang out here. I too lurked here for a long time. I wanted to learn more about various disabilities, so I could maybe be of help if the opportunity ever arose, instead of my usual clueless self, lol!! Ironically, I learned a lot that was helpful later when our younger dd was dx'd with ASD.

 

[ireland_nicole]

Hi; and Welcome!!

I applaud the OP for allowing her children to beleive. Of course, I know the "secret" but I still pretend I don't! I hope my children will believe for a long time. Children are forced to grow up so fast now, so the longer they believe, the better, in my opinion. Let them enjoy it! They will figure it all out later, but for now, let's let our children enjoy being children and all the stuff that goes along with childhood.


My small print disclaimer in case someone doesn't think I belong here.....I'm just dropping in here....I don't have a kiddo with a dx condition, but I do have several close friends with children who have ASD.

 

[bookwormde]

As an aspie I would never “lie” to my children but truth in our world is much more about what you believe than what might be the perception of physical reality. Santa, Mickey, princesses and heroes are about the best of our beliefs and aspirations and are they any further from reality than the belief that the desk we sit in front or the chair we sit in is really “solid” which with the understanding of current physics and unified theory and associated multivurse and string theory and related harmonics has shown this all to be an illusion of atomic, magnetic, gravitational and other natural forces and how our senses and mind perceive them.

Reality is all about the mind so is an idea any less real than generally accepted physical reality. This is how I explain these paradoxes to my children. The only thing that we can be completely sure of is out own consciousness.

bookwormde

 

[BeckyScott]

Both of the kids have a decent understanding of make-believe. When we went to Disney, some rides that were "scary" we got past because I would explain the special effects. Neither child believed for a second that the characters were real, but they still loved talking to them. That sort of thing has happened with us for a long time-- I come from a theater background and even when the kids were very young, I would explain how they did stuff on tv. We had sort of the opposite problem- they regularly ask me if something on tv was real or not-- because anymore, it's hard to tell, and he was assuming everything on the tv was fake.

Having said that, they both still believe. Although oldest DS is 11 now and has started to not believe some of the things- I got caught on the tooth fairy , the Easter Bunny just isn't possible because of the logic of it, not scientifically possible. It's the logical side of it, always thinking that way. I think I know who's next on the chopping block.

But he's taking it all right. This year, for Halloween, he decided on his own that he'd rather be at home passing out candy, than to go out himself. And he's only 11 and has at least another year, and given that he has a younger sibling he could get away with being the "escort" for at least 3 more years...

The youngest is 8 and I think he still believes. He hasn't given me any indication that he doesn't. Last year he voluntarily slept in his room, instead of the living room where he sleeps every other night of the year, because he was afraid Santa wouldn't come if he saw him sleeping there. I expect that we'll transition him when we feel it's time.

 

[MomOf2DisneyKids]

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The youngest is 8 and I think he still believes. He hasn't given me any indication that he doesn't. Last year he voluntarily slept in his room, instead of the living room where he sleeps every other night of the year, because he was afraid Santa wouldn't come if he saw him sleeping there. .

OMG, this is us too! LOL