I am excited for you and your family. We are from NY also. We went to DL two years ago for the first time for my daughter and my first time in over 20 years. We will be flying in on the 9th and coming home on the 14th. I would recommend figuring out what you have to do attraction wise and go there first once you get in the park. When we went we would do rope drop and then hit up a couple of rides and go to Red Rose Tavern for the Mickey Pancakes when they open up and then wander around from there and hit up rides based on wait times. Mid afternoon we would head back to the resort and hang out at the poll for a bit or take a nap and then head back over around dinner time. The rest of the dining we did was all quick service or the pool menu at
Disneyland Hotel.
Biggest thing that you will find that is different from WDW is that everything is right there and you can walk between the parks if you have park hoppers. Everything feels closer and you won't spend as much time walking from one place to the next which is something I really enjoy.
Where are you flying out of/into? We are flying from Syracuse to Newark on the evening of the 8th and then to LAX on the morning of the 9th so that we can hopefully be at the hotel by 1:30ish.