The saddest sight in the world . . .

[Deb in IA]

is a baby who is not loved.

I am attending in our hospital's newborn nursery this month. Last week, a pair of "sisters-in-law" from Chicago rolled into the delivery suite, each ready to pop out a baby. Seems they came to Iowa to deliver because they heard the welfare was better here than in Chicago. They were both, oh, about 24 and each had had about 6 or 7 babies already.

Well, after the babies are born, we go to see the moms in their hospital room. There is a party going on, with probably 12 or 13 family members, TV turned up full volume, laughing, shouting, eating, etc.

Baby in lying in a bassinet, off to the side, sleeping. NO ONE IS PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO THE CHILD.

We examine baby, and ask mom what her name is. She doesn't even look at the infant. "Oh, I dunno. I haven't thought about that."

One of the sisters-in-law is scheduled to have her tubes tied the next day. (The only commendable thing I've seen from this bunch so far!) BUT, she cancels it at the last minute, because she has to be NPO (can't eat for 4 hours prior to the procedure), and she want to eat her breakfast!!! Aftewards, she decides that she will go ahead with the tubal, and wants to get on the OR schedule RIGHT THEN!! When she's told that the surgeons have gone on to the other scheduled cases, she becomes enraged and throws a fit!!

I am amazed, and incredibly saddened, at some people's behavior.

 

[olena]

 

[emmy]

Very sad, especially when there are so many loving devoted parents that would cherish those babies.

 

[jamsmom]

It is so sad to think of what may lay ahead for those babies.

 

[binny]

some peoples kids!

 

[Mickey's sunshine]

Deb, that is so very sad. That poor innocent little baby. She does not deserve to keep that baby.

 

[helenabear]

That is really very upsetting... I don't even know what to say to that. I wish the kids all the best!

 

[debster812]

How heartbreaking. Utterly heartbreaking.

 

[TeresaNJ]

Hearing things like this makes me sick, especially considering the two years of infertility treatments I went through, not to mention the surgeries, to try to have a baby with my second DH who has no children and would make a wonderful father. I just don't understand things sometimes. Those poor children.

 

[Pooh93]

That just made me physically ill.

I just don't understand things sometimes.

Me either.

 

[4greatboys]

The thought of babies and/or children not being loved and cherished just breaks my heart. How can you have a baby and not be head over heals in love with your baby? How can you not want to give your child the world? To make them know they are the most special thing that has ever happened to you?
It's just heartbreaking to think of children being treated as a burden or just a thing.

 

[mamajoan]

Deb I realize that these women were not doing anything illegal, however ... could not have Social Services been notified as to the Doc's worries of parenting problems and skills?.. You and I both know that the system is overloaded... but if SS had made an initial visit in the hospital.. it would have at least been written down in the chart, that the SS had been called into do an evaluation of the parent. Sometimes it takes a little push...

I don't know if it would make any difference.. I just hate seeing the system abused, the child neglected.. while others who are in NEED take on the unwarranted shame associated with justified Welfare Assistance.

 

[Kitty 34]

Deb, how incredibly sad and unfortunetly reminds me of when I had my second DS. My roommate was a 17 yr old who was more interested in "entertaining" her cheerleader friends and a couple of football players the whole time she was there. She totally ignored her baby which just broke my heart for the little one.

My DH and I got so tired of the "partying" that we got permission to leave for home with our son.........he was 19 hrs old.

 

[janette]

How sad for those babies. I wish they would think of the many couples who would be thrilled to give those babies the love they need.

The large county hospital here has volunteers that come in to hold the babies I think that would be a neat thing to do if I had the time.

 

[Jomrog]

I just don't get it. With both my babies, I couldn't put them down. I often fell asleep w/them in my arms or nursing them & then would startle awake and afraid that I would drop them. I hated putting them down.

It just breaks my heart to hear that people are so cold.

 

[Claudia1]

This post makes me proud of my DD. She truly loves her DD and has never done anything like this.

And to take this on a slight tangent........

Remember that these kids grow up (hopefully!) to be the child seated next to your child in school. They need just as much love at 7 or 13 as they do as newborns.

Take a moment to hug another child today.

Thanks for posting, Deb.

 

[mamajoan]

Claudia.. amazing.. THANKS SO MUCH FOR THAT WONDERFUL IDEA!